Welcome to the Australian Ford Forums forum.

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and inserts advertising. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features without post based advertising banners. Registration is simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Please Note: All new registrations go through a manual approval queue to keep spammers out. This is checked twice each day so there will be a delay before your registration is activated.

Go Back   Australian Ford Forums > General Topics > Non Ford Related Community Forums > The Bar

The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-10-2005, 05:46 PM   #1
Charliewool
Bolt Nerd
Donating Member3
 
Charliewool's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Ojochal, Costa Rica (Pura Vida!)
Posts: 14,931
Default Transylvanian doctor

Transylvanian Doctor

Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, are vacationing in Europe; as it happens, in Transylvania.

They're driving a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It's late, and raining very hard. Bob can barely see 10 feet in front of the car.

Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail. The car swerves and smashes into a tree. Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his new wife unconscious, with her head bleeding.

Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to carry her to the nearest phone.

Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming from an old, large house. He approaches the door and knocks.

A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife, Betty. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone??"

"I'm sorry," replies the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor. Come in and I will get him."

Bob brings his wife in. An elegant man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor. I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory."

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries; so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.

After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion."

Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty Hill are no more.

The Hills' deaths upsets Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his pipe organ. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. As the music fills the lab, his eyes catch movement. He notices the fingers on Betty Hill's hand twitch. Stunned, he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise! He is further amazed as Betty sits straight up!

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory. He bursts in and shouts to his master:
Wait for IT....


"Master, Master!...The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"

__________________
Current vehicles.. Yamaha Rhino UTV, SWB 4L TJ Jeep, and boring Lhd RAV4
Bionic BF F6... UPDATE: Replaced by Shiro White 370z 7A Roadster. SOLD
Workhack: FG Silhouette XR50 Turbo ute (11.63@127.44mph) SOLD
2 wheels.. 2015 103ci HD Wideglide.. SOLD
SOLD THE LOT, Voted with our feet and relocated to COSTA RICA for some Pura Vida!
(Ex Blood Orange #023 FPV Pursuit owner : )
Charliewool is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 06-10-2005, 05:59 PM   #2
Sagerian
Custom User Title:
 
Sagerian's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Sydney
Posts: 651
Default

*shakes head* Dear oh dear.
__________________
____________
Just sometimes, in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that four hundredth glass of cornershop p**s at 3am, you do sometimes look at yourself and think... this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
Sagerian is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 12:11 AM   #3
loxxr6
XB in parts...
 
loxxr6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Sydney
Posts: 2,890
Default

pathetic, but it will now go on to horrify other people....others must suffer as I have lol.
__________________


Daily Driver 2019 Ford Escape...looking for XR6T's.


loxxr6 is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 12:20 AM   #4
WizBang
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Perth
Posts: 551
Default

Somethings aren't worth wait for and the punch line on this was one of those things but at least you got to share it with us and not the hole world
WizBang is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 12:25 AM   #5
neb
hibernating
 
neb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,135
Default

worst joke ever
neb is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 12:25 AM   #6
zetec
Zoom Zoom
 
zetec's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Melbourne, VIC
Posts: 4,352
Default

On that note I'm off to bed...
__________________
2012 Mazda3 MPS
zetec is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 03:30 PM   #7
TheSneakiness
Adapt or perish...
 
TheSneakiness's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Dip!@#$
Posts: 7,954
Default

Oh my god...
__________________
Carless
TheSneakiness is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 03:34 PM   #8
LuvinmyEB
Beware of mood swings!
 
LuvinmyEB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Western 'burbs, put your bullet proof vests on!
Posts: 1,336
Default

*groans* :
__________________
1993 EBII GLi Auto, 4.0L MPI rebuilt by JMM, JMM Dev1 kit, JMM Hi Flow Cat, still to hit the quarter mile.
LuvinmyEB is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 04:14 PM   #9
Danny
GT4.
 
Danny's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 4,218
Default

Ohh thats a shocker.
Danny is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 05:02 PM   #10
GTFORDMAN
Regular Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 118
Default

good greif : :
GTFORDMAN is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 04:56 PM   #11
Mechan1k
Moderator
Donating Member1
 
Mechan1k's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kenthurst
Posts: 40,403
Valued Contributor: For members whose non technical contributions are worthy of recognition. - Issue reason: Brings a wealth of knowledge to the forums and is frequently giving helpful advice. Technical Contributor: For members who share their technical expertise. - Issue reason: Always willing to help out with technical information. 
Default

I was expecting something better for a Friday afternoon .. but that was bad.
What a let down.

On that note ... I'm off to the pub.
Mechan1k is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 07-10-2005, 05:00 PM   #12
Sourbastard
Moderator
Contributing Member
 
Sourbastard's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Adelaide SA
Posts: 5,584
Default

*Sourbastards gnarled hand hovers over the delete thread button*
__________________

1965 XP Falcon Deluxe Sedan
1978 XC Falcon Wagon Rallypack
2003 BA Fairlane G220

Windsor Powah!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7hT9dxD2hM

Sourbastard is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +11. The time now is 07:21 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Other than what is legally copyrighted by the respective owners, this site is copyright www.fordforums.com.au
Positive SSL