My mothers legaly blind... what do i do :s

Skotty · 08-06-2007, 07:30 PM

Hey guys, well yeah as the topic says I found out thismorning that my mum is legally blind... rather depressing, i actually broke down when I heard at work... So yeah what exactly does it mean hardly any vision I know that... but how is the quality of life going to be, It really upsets me when I think about it, because she's only 50, going on 51 late this year so still not really that old...

I'm allready tempted to packup my stuff and move back to mount gambier (I live in adelaide which is approx 450km from mt gambier) and help her out, which is the moral thing to do, because I don't have any tie down up in adelaide...

Stuff like this makes me question things like relgion?karma? does it exist, why should a 50yo woman have this drawn apon her, since she was 22yo she had been a fulltime single mother, raise myslelf and my two older sister - (who are 30 and 22 I'm 19) and done all that by herself on government handouts, only just struggling to make ends meet, only just being able to put food on the table each night... she hasne't been able to work as she left the work force when my eldest sister was born... she has been going volunteer work since I was 16ish...

I know it makes me sound like a whimp, but i find it rather upsetting because I want her to see my grow into a man, get married and have kids, buy a house.. and i it seems as if it's been cut short... i know I should be atleast happy that she's a alive, but I sorta think would she want to be alive facting the music the ming be blind before shes 55 :s...

I know this don't make much sense but yeah sorry for the ranting on guys i'm just really cut up and confussed

Falcon_Phill · 08-06-2007, 07:33 PM

Legally blind dosnt mean fully blind, so as long as she can still see and it dosnt deteriorate it should be so bad. I wouldnt advise driving for her though.

Skotty · 08-06-2007, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Falcon_Phill

Legally blind dosnt mean fully blind, so as long as she can still see and it dosnt deteriorate it should be so bad. I wouldnt advise driving for her though.

Yeah, I told her for ages I didn't want her to drive, her driving would scare the ***** out of me, and yeah... the doctor told her yesterday that she shouldn't drive... It sucks cause shes just wasted $500 she didn't have on repairs to her car... which shes going to have to sell now..

Dezza · 08-06-2007, 07:36 PM

My old badminton coach was legally blind and deaf. He still enjoyed coaching, and did a terrific job of it. My team won a grand final, and made it into a few others with his help. He's proof that you can have good quality of life, despite the handicap.

Feathers · 08-06-2007, 08:03 PM

My great uncle is legally blind as well, but he has his wife (a retired nurse) to help him around.
Get in contact with Vision Australia.
There are plenty of options to help your mum with mobility and independence, and they can point you in the right direction.

Turboconvert · 08-06-2007, 08:43 PM

mate, just cause she can not physically see u get married doesnt mean that the moment will not be deteriated. i am sure that just having her there will be the main thing. as to wiether you should move mt gambier or not is entierly up to you there is no 'real right or wrong' thing to do here (well in my eyes anyway). personaly i would try and move back just to help her out, but for me that would be the right thing to do (but that is me). the main thing will be getting her the help she needs for a good quality of life. If that so happens to mean that you have to move back than i would say move back. but only you and your family can really decide on that. talk it over with your family, talk about what her needs are, what your needs are and how you will be able to help from adeliade as to how you can help in mt gambier. that is my main advice

about religion/karma stuff i could give you reasons for its existance, but that is another topic/arguement altogether which should really not be discussed on this forum especially as i am sure it would raise a very big arguement. not to mention it would detract from the original intention of this post which was to get advice about how best to help your legaly blind mother. oh and if i where you i would drop into centrelink and see what options in regards to disablity payments (and carer support) that might be avaliable to your mother and whoever ends up helping her out.....

hope i have been helpful and best of luck with it all mate. hope she lives to a ripe odd age with good quality of life (sorry for the long post)

Skotty · 08-06-2007, 08:50 PM

Yeah thats what I was thinking of doing, I know I sound snobby I wanna help her but theres also things in my life I wanna do at the moment, which means I have to pull long hours at work so I wouldn't be around much to help my mum... (IE car I want is 12 - 15k, the bed i want is another 3k home theter sys the list goes on) but yeah, I would move back to mount gambier if I could get a job down there because well my mum has no family left down there and she doesn't like adelaide...

Dazza XLT · 08-06-2007, 09:01 PM

My missus has only 7% normal vision, and she is legally blind.
She's very independent and manages to do most things herself. She is studying Uni at the moment, and has a CCTV setup to zoom in on text, books, magazines etc.
You can purchase programs for PC's called Zoomtext which also can help as well.
You really need to find out how much vision she does have, then go from there.
Have a chat to Centrelink. There's taxi vouchers available so she can maintain some mobility. If you were to move back to care for her, you would be entitled to a carers allowance, as long as you work less than 20 hours a week.
Make sure she applies for the disability pension straight away, she will also get a health care card which too helps out with prescriptions.
Check around the local area for a disability support office of some description. They've helped us out a lot here, they have helped my better half organize a teaching placement for her course next semester.
Contact Guide Dogs/ Seeing Eye Dogs Australia in your state, they run mobility courses including Cane Training, and if need be will issue a guide dog to her for day to day use.

Just remember, it is certainly hard, but there are a lot of people out there that are willing to help both you and your mum.

Cheers

Darran

Skotty · 08-06-2007, 09:11 PM

Thanks for the replys so far guys, That's the best part of AFF, it is such a great place and a mature bunch of people for finding out the sort of information like what i'm searching for, comperd to places such nissansilvia

Nostalgia · 08-06-2007, 09:21 PM

Mate, the word whimp does not even come into this situation. The fact that you have come here for advice shows that you are a man and strong enough to work through this situation that you are now in. Best wishes to you and all the best in whatever you decide to do. My late GrandFather was legally blind for 14 years but he could still read novels with the use of a magnifying aid.

nobbystang · 10-06-2007, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skotty

Thanks for the replys so far guys, That's the best part of AFF, it is such a great place and a mature bunch of people for finding out the sort of information like what i'm searching for, comperd to places such nissansilvia

Mate, you're not a wimp. Its times like these we need to put things back in perspective and appreciate family. Vision Australia has been mentioned a few times so far, definately get in touch with them. My mum works for them, and their role is to come out to your mums house and assess her lifestyle. They work with vision impaired and when they visit your mum they will recommend changes she can make to make her life easier. Just simple things you wouldn't think of that can be a big help.

Good Luck

gtfpv · 08-06-2007, 09:29 PM

theres worse things in life mate. regarding you looking after her. you should discuss this with your 2 sisters, and your mother . it's more up to what your mum wants, not you. also it shouldn't be your responsibility. discuss the best option with your family.
it's ok to be upset, let it take it's course.

**GasoLane** · 09-06-2007, 01:23 PM

Dont sweat it too much. As Alan Moffatt said (many) years ago "10% of people on the road are Legally Blind. So when they hit you and say 'they did'nt see you' they mean it!"

Dazza XLT · 09-06-2007, 02:17 PM

Some handy links for you-

Guide Dogs SA/NT

Vision Australia

Seeing Eye Dogs of Australia

Blind Citizens of Australia

Cheers

Darran

GT-E · 10-06-2007, 08:23 PM

My Gran is 80, blind and has Diabetes and lives on her own. She is able to take care of herself, with the help of the community services and neighbours she manages very well.
Blindness is not the end of her life of independance. It might take a little while to ajust, but I am sure your mum is a strong woman and will do just fine with or without you moving in.

Skotty · 10-06-2007, 08:27 PM

cheers guys

Lots of good advice

SSN8R · 12-06-2007, 05:28 AM

sorry to hear about it man, i would break down at work aswell if i heard the same thing about my mother. i would too try and help her out in the best and most convenient way possible.

but like many others said in this thread be happy that its not the end of the road and you're still there for her and vice versa. remain focused on your life and future as well as helping your mother out..things will only get better this way

all the best bro

Skotty · 15-06-2007, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SSN8R

sorry to hear about it man, i would break down at work aswell if i heard the same thing about my mother. i would too try and help her out in the best and most convenient way possible.

but like many others said in this thread be happy that its not the end of the road and you're still there for her and vice versa. remain focused on your life and future as well as helping your mother out..things will only get better this way

all the best bro

That's mate, my mum had the vision impered mob at her place last week, and they were helping her out, telling here what she can do, companys that can help her, they even asked if she needed assistance by meals on wheels, but she said she is still good enough to cook her own meals so yeah