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Old 15-03-2005, 10:44 PM   #1
Captain Stubing
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Default Alcohol consumption warnings

They've had warnings on cigarette packets for years about how smoking effected your health for a while now (I only ever smoked the packs that had warnings relating to pregnancy... that way I was safe!) now they may be putting similar warnings on cans and bottles of our favourite sustenance! Here's some of the suggestions being put forward...

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a ****er.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your face in.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your trousers.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you possess mystical Kung-Fu powers.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species, and/or name you can't remember)

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are laughing with you.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
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Old 16-03-2005, 02:30 AM   #2
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Good laugh there.
One i haven't seen before but someone is bound to say it's a re-post.
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Old 16-03-2005, 10:43 AM   #3
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:



hehe had to do it. But really, it is a repost. Quite funny though :baby bott
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Old 16-03-2005, 05:30 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swanny
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.

hahaha so true
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Old 16-03-2005, 06:12 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swanny
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.
bwha ha ha!!!
yeah that's happened a few times :
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Old 16-03-2005, 07:15 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swanny
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species, and/or name you can't remember).
OOPS, I've been sprung
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Quote:
Originally Posted by big_waity
Oh, and another surefire symptom will be the Falcon badge at the back.
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Old 16-03-2005, 07:56 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swanny

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
oh im so gonna laugh the next time i see a chick with rug burns on her forehead!!
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Old 16-03-2005, 08:23 PM   #8
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warning Alcohol causes ugly chick to get laid
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Old 16-03-2005, 08:54 PM   #9
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Alcohol, helping ugly people get laid since 1527

Theres a few good ones there,
...used to put some on my home brew batches
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