|
|
|
|
|
|
Welcome to the Australian Ford Forums forum. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and inserts advertising. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features without post based advertising banners. Registration is simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. Please Note: All new registrations go through a manual approval queue to keep spammers out. This is checked twice each day so there will be a delay before your registration is activated. |
|
|||||||
| The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat |
 |
|
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
05-01-2006, 09:29 PM
|
#1 | ||
|
LIFELONG DJR SUPPORTER
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CENTRAL QUEENSLAND
Posts: 5,324
|
A thread by Some bloke with a holden name has promted me to start this thread.
What great one liners have you got on the text, I'll start. "Do you remember that time on the train? I stuck my Asre out the window, and you stuck your head out the window, and people thought we were twins"! What You got?
__________________
|
||
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 09:36 PM
|
#2 | ||
|
Lucifer's Angel
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Sydney
Posts: 5,282
|
I have a great one, but I'm not looking for a holiday, so I'm not posting it.
__________________
 SINISTER BA XR6 Blueprint, manual, 4490's, Redback 2.5" dual exhaust, BA Typhoon rims, tint, fog light covers, BF tailights, blue illuminated window switches, Ghia bootlid carpet, lower grille, FPV door spears, steering wheel & interior bits, XR6T + F6 intake, K&N filter, Typhoon spoiler, tuned, sway bars, custom angel eyes & plates..YUM!
If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford... It's being beaten by a girl driving a Ford  |
||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 09:50 PM
|
#3 | |||
|
AFF's 1st DM.......
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Wha???... There is only 2 states 2 be in.. WA or Drunk..
Posts: 6,200
|
whats ya mobile # n ill send it to ya ahahahahaha.
__________________
FORD GIVING POWER TO THE PEOPLE Alloy headed 347ci EDXR8 13.21 @107.7mph Quote:
 :
|
|||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 09:51 PM
|
#4 | |||
|
Cobblers!
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: The Shire, NSW
Posts: 4,489
|
Quote:
__________________
Ego BFII Ghia Titanium Silver E53 X5 4.4i Gunmetal EF XR6. Now retired from active duty. Roses are red. Violets are blue. OS X rocks. Homage to you. |
|||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 09:51 PM
|
#5 | ||
|
Formerly au^ute
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: VIC
Posts: 1,032
|
too inappropriate to post
|
||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 10:11 PM
|
#6 | ||
|
LIFELONG DJR SUPPORTER
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CENTRAL QUEENSLAND
Posts: 5,324
|
Now now, Don't be bashfull!
__________________
|
||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 10:15 PM
|
#7 | ||
|
Bolt Nerd
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Ojochal, Costa Rica (Pura Vida!)
Posts: 14,852
|
I have a few...
Pacific cruise ship sinks with only 3 survivers, Dave, Darren & Daisy. They swimto a small island and live therefor a couple of years doing what comes naturally. ButDaisy feels so bad about having sex with both Dave & Darren, she kills herself.. Sad for Dave & Darren, but they get over it and again nature takes it's course. After a couple more years the lads feel really bad about what they are doing..... So they bury her! Another... Nun gets on a train. skinhead in front of her eating prawns, he starts spitting the heads at her. she grabs the prawns & throws them out the window & pulls emergency cord. Skinhead says.. you'll get find $50 for that you stupid ****. Nun replies,when I cry rape and they smell your fingers, you'll get 10 years you **** One more.. A little girl goes into a barbers shop & stands beside the chair eating a cake, Barber says.. You gunna get hair on your muffin,, little girl says,, Yep, gunna get boobs too!
__________________
Current vehicles.. Yamaha Rhino UTV, SWB 4L TJ Jeep, and boring Lhd RAV4 Bionic BF F6... UPDATE: Replaced by Shiro White 370z 7A Roadster. SOLD Workhack: FG Silhouette XR50 Turbo ute (11.63@127.44mph) SOLD 2 wheels.. 2015 103ci HD Wideglide.. SOLD SOLD THE LOT, Voted with our feet and relocated to COSTA RICA for some Pura Vida! (Ex Blood Orange #023 FPV Pursuit owner  : )
|
||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 10:26 PM
|
#8 | |||
|
Lucifer's Angel
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Sydney
Posts: 5,282
|
Quote:
__________________
SINISTER BA XR6 Blueprint, manual, 4490's, Redback 2.5" dual exhaust, BA Typhoon rims, tint, fog light covers, BF tailights, blue illuminated window switches, Ghia bootlid carpet, lower grille, FPV door spears, steering wheel & interior bits, XR6T + F6 intake, K&N filter, Typhoon spoiler, tuned, sway bars, custom angel eyes & plates..YUM!
If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford... It's being beaten by a girl driving a Ford |
|||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 10:44 PM
|
#9 | |||
|
Back where I belong
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Mexico - Victoria
Posts: 947
|
Quote:
I got one from a mate.. Hey I need you to come down to Knox Police Station, I have been arrested for being the ugliest **** in the world, and I need you to come to prove them wrong.... Also had plenty that would get me a holiday.....
__________________
Regards Craig |
|||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 10:50 PM
|
#10 | ||
|
Lucifer's Angel
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Sydney
Posts: 5,282
|
I had a few variations on the same theme sent to me years ago...
*insert service provider here* regrets to inform you, your birth was an accident, please report to your nearest vet to be put down. *insert service provider here* regrets to advise that you were switched at birth, please report to your closest zoo to find your real parents"
__________________
SINISTER BA XR6 Blueprint, manual, 4490's, Redback 2.5" dual exhaust, BA Typhoon rims, tint, fog light covers, BF tailights, blue illuminated window switches, Ghia bootlid carpet, lower grille, FPV door spears, steering wheel & interior bits, XR6T + F6 intake, K&N filter, Typhoon spoiler, tuned, sway bars, custom angel eyes & plates..YUM!
If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford... It's being beaten by a girl driving a Ford |
||
|
|
|
|
05-01-2006, 11:17 PM
|
#11 | ||
|
[EBGLT]
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Cazza Dee
Posts: 4,829
|
Billy walked into the guinness book of records claining that he had the smallest ИИИИ alive, he walked out yellin gwho the f!@# is MNM96?
There you go boys how is that one? Shaun
__________________
[EBGLT] Become an E-Series Owners Club Member Today!
http://eseries.com.au/index.php/membership/ |
||
|
|
|
|
06-01-2006, 12:06 AM
|
#12 | ||
|
Banned
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Oakleigh
Posts: 3,844
|
this rabbit gets out of a cigereet factory after years of animal testing, on his way out, he sees this other rabbit, he says to the other rabbit " my god iv been in this cigerett factory for years, im finaly out" the other one replyd " you must be hungry , come wit me", so there bouncin along all these felds and sees fields of carrots, but says, "na, dont feel like carrots really" so they skip along to the next field thats growing letece, and says " na, not really after that ethir" so the other one says " what do u want then?" and the other one replys "is there a shop around here, im dyin for a smoke"
this was off my old 3315 or whateva it was, i had a few oth them, but i chucked that away as soon as i saw colour and polys lol |
||
|
|
|
|
06-01-2006, 08:32 AM
|
#13 | |||
|
LIFELONG DJR SUPPORTER
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CENTRAL QUEENSLAND
Posts: 5,324
|
Quote:
__________________
|
|||
|
|
|
|
06-01-2006, 08:35 AM
|
#14 | ||
|
LIFELONG DJR SUPPORTER
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CENTRAL QUEENSLAND
Posts: 5,324
|
If your partner has put on a little too much weight, get them to walk 2 miles in the morning and 2 miles in the evening. By the end of the week the fat ar$$es will be 28 miles away!
__________________
|
||
|
|
|
|
06-01-2006, 09:05 AM
|
#15 | ||
|
It's Cat huntin season...
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Wagga Wagga
Posts: 515
|
Remember when you were a little boy and you use to blow bubbles in the bath? Will bubble is out of gaol and want to catch up
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A 16yr old girl sits on Santa's knee, "What do you want for christmas?" Santa asks. The girl replies "Hair on my p******". "How about a white beard" says Santa.
__________________
XRB055 - Black BA MkII XR8 Ute. 6 Speed manual, Leather seats, hard lid. To do list - Cat back exhaust, new wheels, new shock and front sway bar, and whatever else seems like a good idea Old Ride XR40RD - Phantom BA XR6 160 rear wheel killer wasps - Pacemakers - 3" HiFlo Cat - 2.5 Redback exhaust - 18" Speedy Graphite Rims - Dumped on King Superlows - Standard ICC with iPod cradle, 5x7" Boston Acoustics, 12 Alpine sub powered by 4 channel Alpine amp |
||
|
|
|
|
06-01-2006, 10:01 AM
|
#16 | |||
|
Back where I belong
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Mexico - Victoria
Posts: 947
|
Quote:
__________________
Regards Craig |
|||
|
|
|
Show us your SMS Joke.
Linear Mode
