classic sterio types that get in the way.

[Bushbasher]

After reading the bonehead incident thread it got me thinking about all the typical mobile chicanes on the road that get in the way or generally give you grief so thought it would be a laugh to list some of the ones you come across. Now, I've never been a city dweller so my list is more about small/medium town and rural pains in the a$$; here's a couple to get us started...



1- The doddering old man/woman in the old corolla-pulsar-lancer etc. who can barely see over the steering wheel and struggles to get out of 3rd gear on the road, is a menace in a car park and has the reaction time of a sleeping wombat.

2- The doddering old man in the last falcon/commodore he bought so see out his days, usually over 10 yrs old and as much as 30yrs old or more. the older the car the older and more dangerous the driver usually. He never takes off his hat and won't give ground to anyone anytime cos it's his god given right to be on the road and drive however he likes cos he's been here alot longer than you sonny. He has the same reaction time and driving style as group 1 but is blessed with the arrogance and ignorance to just not give a sh!t.

3- The sad, lonely. Usually driving the run down Nissan Vanette/Toyota Liteace or similar but sometimes some other piece of crap that is too slow to get out of it's own way. Easily spotted because the cabin is full of pets. Usually one or more of those annoying little yap yap dogs but just as likely to be the biggest, fattest dog/s you can imagine and even a cat or two. He's a skinny emaciated looking specimen with said yap yap sitting on his lap as he drives. He can't cook, and lives on beer and tobacco, with yellow fingers and teeth from a lifetime of chain smoking rollies. She's usually somewhat larger and you wonder how she manages to get behind the wheel of the Vanette and steer without getting the wheel stuck in her gut.

4- (My personal pet hate) The local ignorant cocky who thinks it's HIS bit of road because he has paddocks/properties either side( this can be 50m or 50km) and no matter what or when, he'll putt up the highway at no more than 80km/h even though he's only carrying a bale of hay and a drum of oil, and he'll never yield or pull off the road to let traffic by no matter what. You can pick him by the beat up sad looking old 4x4 tray top ute that's never been washed and, like group 2, he never takes off his hat which is usually a sad, wide brimmed thing with no shape or structure left in it cos it's as old as he and his ute is. He's also blessed with the same attitude as group 2 so he never looks in his mirrors to see what's going on behind him cos he don't give a rats....


There's got to be plenty more so who's got one to share?


Bushbasher