The Lucky Country!

[Charliewool]

How True!!!

THE ANT & THE GRASSHOPPER

THE ORIGINAL STORY OF THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances

and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering

grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

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THE MODERN AUSTRALIAN VERSION



The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,

building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances

and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and

demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed
while others less fortunate like him are cold and starving.


The ABC and Channel 9 show up to provide live coverage of

the shivering grasshopper, with cuts to a video of the ant in his

comfortable warm home with a table filled with food.


Australians are stunned that in a country of such wealth,

this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.

The Democrats, the Greens and the Coalition Against Poverty demonstrate

in front of the ant's house.


The ABC, interrupting an Aboriginal cultural festival

special from North Queensland with breaking news, broadcasts them
singing

"We Shall Overcome."


Bob Brown rants in an interview with Ray Martin that the

ant has gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an

immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."



In response to polls, the Liberal Government drafts the

Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti-Discrimination Act, retrospective
to the beginning of the summer.

It is quickly passed through the Senate.

The ant's taxes are reassessed and he is also fined for failing to hire

grass hoppers as helpers.

Without enough money to pay both the fine and his newly

imposed retrospective taxes, his home is confiscated by the

government.


The ant moves to Asia, and starts a successful agribiz company.


The TV stations later show the now fat grasshopper finishing up the

last of the ant's food though Spring is still months away, while the

government owned house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old

house crumbles around him because he hadn't maintained it.

Inadequate government funding is blamed, Kim Beasley now is appointed

to head commission of inquiry that will cost $10,000,000.



The grasshopper is soon dead of a drug overdose; the Sydney Morning

Herald blames it on obvious failure of government to address the root

causes of despair arising from social inequity.



The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders,

praised by the government for enriching Australia's multicultural

diversity, who promptly terrorize the community.