Depression, Anxiety

[superyob]

Originally Posted by LTDHO

Do people music tastes change?

Definitely..

[Fordster91]

I believe to overcome depressions and anxiety, it takes a long while and you have to be honest to yourself and willing to work towards overcoming them no matter what.
Set yourself goals that you canwork towards to, surround yourself by positive people. If there are none near to you, go where they are, try to blend in although you feel uncomfortable. Take one step at a time and make sure you have an emergency plan for your darkest hours. It can be anything, taking a walk, hitting the gym, calling a friend. Whatever helps, really.

[GTLexus]

Such a good thread.

Sometimes people, especially blokes, don't want to talk about there issues and they are usually the ones living a quiet hell. Everyone is different and all sorts of things can cause depression/anxienty.

It took myself to reach a point in my life to feel safe, comfortable and secure and then depression and anxiety really hit hard. The psychologist stated it is due to being in a safe place has let my mind to lower the barriers I had built since I had been a child.

Like everyone has said before:

go see a doctor
have all physical tests performed first as sometimes a physical issue can bring you down men tally
eat healthy (try no artificial flavours and additives like 600 numbers)
exercise is important. It realises serotonines and other chemicals in your brain. It also moves all lactic acid built up in your body. (I have a PT for twice a week and it helps me sleep at night too)
Have good friends/family around. You may need to trim the fat of negativity (is a hard process in itself)

If talking meds, be prepared for a rollercoaster ride of your life. My meds state "Caution, risk of self harm increases in first few weeks of taking" what the heck???

Oh yeah, find someone to talk to. Even if a few people.

[Grega]

one often wonders if it will ever go away.

[Ross 1]

It will, but it is the proverbial how long is a piece of string. Took me a few years, have a couple of friends where one took about a year and the other is still sorting himself out 5 years later. The longer it goes the better your coping skills get and your ability to keep functioning improves, which in turn makes you feel more confident.

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Ross 1

It will, but it is the proverbial how long is a piece of string. Took me a few years, have a couple of friends where one took about a year and the other is still sorting himself out 5 years later. The longer it goes the better your coping skills get and your ability to keep functioning improves, which in turn makes you feel more confident.

Yeah I've been at it for a while now. It use to worry me but now it doesn't because I'm living my life my way and not the illness' way. Haven't seen my doctors for a year now so I'm regained control but I am always vigilant. I hope to one day be off the medication but I know it will take time and as long I can live my life the way I want then I'm happy to keep taking them.
There is no right or wrong its what best suits the individual.

[supershifty]

Originally Posted by BLUEYBA

Yeah I've been at it for a while now. It use to worry me but now it doesn't because I'm living my life my way and not the illness' way. Haven't seen my doctors for a year now so I'm regained control but I am always vigilant. I hope to one day be off the medication but I know it will take time and as long I can live my life the way I want then I'm happy to keep taking them.
There is no right or wrong its what best suits the individual.

Originally Posted by Grega

one often wonders if it will ever go away.

In my mind anxiety will never go away for me. I don't know how it developed in my mind - used to be a very shy lad in my teen years, then became confident and outgoing person, then became anxious in my latter years. Dunno what gives there?

I'm on Loxalate medication and that has helped muchly with anxiety.

I have difficulty with anxiety attacks in crowded places like shopping centres - I manage them by avoiding them. I also have difficulty talking to new people I meet at social gatherings - you'll find me talking to the family pet!

There's nothing wrong with me, I make friends easily, it's all just a state of mind. Just can't get my head around it all.

Cheers!

[Streets]

Funny timing this thread popping up.

I started a new job in IT about a month ago and have not been going well. I hate IT work but applied for the job because I was unemployed and because I have just always done IT work.

The job is stressful and the commute is long meaning I am out of the house over 12 hours out of the day. My fitness has gone downhill and I have put on weight. Just last night I woke up at midnight and had a full-blown panic attack because I had to be up at 5.30am and knew I wouldn't be rested enough for the day ahead. I had to call in sick today.

I have had depression in the past but have not been this low in years, if ever.

I am considering quitting this job and going back to studying (haven't done any study in 10 years). However I'm apprehensive about the black mark this would leave on my employment history and also about trying to find a part-time job to support my studies at almost 30 years old. I can't live like this though.

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Streets

Funny timing this thread popping up.

I started a new job in IT about a month ago and have not been going well. I hate IT work but applied for the job because I was unemployed and because I have just always done IT work.

The job is stressful and the commute is long meaning I am out of the house over 12 hours out of the day. My fitness has gone downhill and I have put on weight. Just last night I woke up at midnight and had a full-blown panic attack because I had to be up at 5.30am and knew I wouldn't be rested enough for the day ahead. I had to call in sick today.

I have had depression in the past but have not been this low in years, if ever.

I am considering quitting this job and going back to studying (haven't done any study in 10 years). However I'm apprehensive about the black mark this would leave on my employment history and also about trying to find a part-time job to support my studies at almost 30 years old. I can't live like this though.

I had a night panic attack. they are so bad that you don't want to go back to sleep. You need to get your health right before studying. You need to keep working as well so maybe find a job that is less stressful first and also get yourself to the doctors to get you on the road to recovery

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by supershifty

In my mind anxiety will never go away for me. I don't know how it developed in my mind - used to be a very shy lad in my teen years, then became confident and outgoing person, then became anxious in my latter years. Dunno what gives there?

I'm on Loxalate medication and that has helped muchly with anxiety.

I have difficulty with anxiety attacks in crowded places like shopping centres - I manage them by avoiding them. I also have difficulty talking to new people I meet at social gatherings - you'll find me talking to the family pet!

There's nothing wrong with me, I make friends easily, it's all just a state of mind. Just can't get my head around it all.

Cheers!

You know I was very similar. Quiet and shy in my teens and then became confident and outgoing and then depression and anxiety hit as well. You need to challenge yourself by going to shopping centres. you know the saying "baby steps".

[duaned]

Exactly as above. You need to put yourself in these positions that make you anxious. Over time this will give the primitive brain the message that there is no threat.

[Ford_The_Win]

Originally Posted by Streets

Funny timing this thread popping up.

I started a new job in IT about a month ago and have not been going well. I hate IT work but applied for the job because I was unemployed and because I have just always done IT work.

The job is stressful and the commute is long meaning I am out of the house over 12 hours out of the day. My fitness has gone downhill and I have put on weight. Just last night I woke up at midnight and had a full-blown panic attack because I had to be up at 5.30am and knew I wouldn't be rested enough for the day ahead. I had to call in sick today.

I have had depression in the past but have not been this low in years, if ever.

I am considering quitting this job and going back to studying (haven't done any study in 10 years). However I'm apprehensive about the black mark this would leave on my employment history and also about trying to find a part-time job to support my studies at almost 30 years old. I can't live like this though.

That's a tough situation to be in mate, so I hope you don't feel guilty about your issues. I am going through something similar at the moment - I was unhappy with my previous employer and management, so have jumped ship to a different division (I work at a major university with over 10,000 employees) that is even more dysfunctional, unproductive and cliquey than where I worked previously. The job itself is so incredibly boring and below my skill level that I essentially twiddle my thumbs for the whole day and it's a real struggle. As much as I'd love to bail out, I need the money and I feel like even the worst job would be less stressful than being homeless/unemployed.

The way I cope with these sort of situations is to write down a list of the pros and cons on a piece of paper that allows you to really clarify where you stand on the job rather than focusing on all the negatives. Another tool that many therapists recommend is for you to write down three things you are thankful for every day.

Research also shows that exercise is one of the best ways to reduce stress, depression and bolster overall physical and mental wellbeing. On your days off, do you have time to smash out a workout at the gym? It might help improve your fitness and shift a few of those kilos you have put on, and also help clear your head. I am not a fitness freak by any means but go to the gym every single day, even if it's just for a bit of a light cardio workout, and this is extremely beneficial for my mental wellbeing, and helps to protect me against the stress I deal with. It also keeps me motivated to look (and apply for) new jobs so I can leave the one I'm in!

I hope that helps?

[buggerlugs]

Just found out today a customer/friend took his own life a week ago. I took another mate up to buy his 1968 XT sedan a month ago. He had been having personal/family problems and he wasn't himself, but I had know idea it would lead to this...........
Just Gobsmacked...............

[TheSneakiness]

Been a real tough time for me with separating from my wife and son.

Anyone who tells you separation anxiety is a myth in adults seriously has no idea. Everywhere I go I find myself thinking about them, even being at work.

Yes I do go to a psych but its not helping, especially not at the moment. Medication is kinda helping me function but again its not working at the moment with the power my mind has over me.

I miss them both terribly.

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

Been a real tough time for me with separating from my wife and son.

Anyone who tells you separation anxiety is a myth in adults seriously has no idea. Everywhere I go I find myself thinking about them, even being at work.

Yes I do go to a psych but its not helping, especially not at the moment. Medication is kinda helping me function but again its not working at the moment with the power my mind has over me.

I miss them both terribly.

I haven't been through you situation so I don't know how it feels but what I can say is to keep seeing the psychologist as it seems like you're at the bottom and you need support at the moment. It would seem like it isn't helping but things would probably be worse is you didn't keep seeing them.
Its going to take time and they will hopefully help you.

[BENT_8]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

Been a real tough time for me with separating from my wife and son.

Anyone who tells you separation anxiety is a myth in adults seriously has no idea. Everywhere I go I find myself thinking about them, even being at work.

Yes I do go to a psych but its not helping, especially not at the moment. Medication is kinda helping me function but again its not working at the moment with the power my mind has over me.

I miss them both terribly.

Hey man, keep ya chin up.

I've got a close mate, who seperated from his partner about 10 years ago now, they have 2 children together but she is a psycho and wont let him see them.
He had to leave in the end and even today the memories of that time still break him down.

We discuss it regularly as a way of him coping.
My kids went to the same school as his so when ever there was a school event, concert etc. i would try to get some footage or pics of them to show him how they were going.
His daughter once asked mine about her Father and my Daughter told her he is a good man and not to let others tell her otherwise.
Relationships break down, it happens everday and it doesnt have to be a blame game, people just change.

He still struggles at times as can be expected, but i always remind him that one day they will come looking for him and that he needs to be strong now and ready to embrace them when the time comes.

Do what you need to do to cope, if medication helps, take it. Keep talking to the psychologist, you might not see any progress but you are talking about it and that is the most important thing, no good bottling it up.

Its a tough situation fella, no doubt. But with support, and we're here for you whenever you need, you can pull through.

Best wishes.

[OCTANEBOSS]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

Been a real tough time for me with separating from my wife and son.

Anyone who tells you separation anxiety is a myth in adults seriously has no idea. Everywhere I go I find myself thinking about them, even being at work.

Yes I do go to a psych but its not helping, especially not at the moment. Medication is kinda helping me function but again its not working at the moment with the power my mind has over me.

I miss them both terribly.

Hang in there mate. It can take many years to come to terms with separation from loved ones. I had this personal experience myself and things do get better. Its a type of pain you wish on no-one. What ever happens between you both remember your young fella is always going to need you both. Try and be positive of your predicament around him, he maybe feeling the same too. I made a few mistakes along the way which in retrospect I would not do again. Things will look up for you mate, there is always going to be hurdles along the way, that's life unfortunately.

[TheSneakiness]

Thanks all. It was definitely a wake up call that I probably didn't need but my behaviour sort of dictated what happened and I can take ownership of that and work on it, I have said to her that I will change myself and I will repair our relationship, even if we don't get back together there's absolutely no need for the anger, hatred and disdain for each other. It doesn't accomplish anything and could jeopardise any co-parenting myself and her need to do for our son.

The trust is going to take some time to work on and I will mention to her when she's ready to start building that we need to do things together until such time we move on. She knows she needs me so any thoughts of being in a dark place to end it is not an option.

My issue is being bored. My mind is powerful enough in me that those thoughts do come to front and I need things to distract this, like Xbox, cooking, walking (I walk 6km a day at the moment), cleaning, washing, work, hell anything to keep me focused on a task.

[BENT_8]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

My issue is being bored. My mind is powerful enough in me that those thoughts do come to front and I need things to distract this, like Xbox, cooking, walking (I walk 6km a day at the moment), cleaning, washing, work, hell anything to keep me focused on a task.

Join a sporting club if you arent already, best thing i ever did.

I was never really a 'club sports' type of kid growing up, i ran and rode motor x bikes on my own.
I've always been a bit reserved, never mixed in large groups, kept a few staunch friends for ever but rarely let others close.
When things got bad i'd just bottle it up.
My Wife and i had been together for almost 20yrs, but there were still things she didnt understand about me, and a lot of that was my own fault.

One day a neighbour asked me down to the local lawn bowls club for a roll.
I knew nothing about bowls, but i didnt mind a couple of frothies and there arent too many safer and welcoming environments than a bowls club. Yeah its mainly a bunch of oldies but they are always up for a chat and the bull**** flows freely, so down i went.

Regardless of how my game of bowls is today, the network of genuine caring people that i have met through the game is priceless.

Im not working full time at the moment so to keep myself sane i've been down the club for the past 7 weeks completely redecorating the place inside and out, the first time its been touched in 23 years so you can imagine the work involved. It was going to cost them about $10k to have it all done, i made it my gift to them for the support and sense of belonging that they have provided me.
Thats the other good thing about clubs, never a shortage of jobs to do, never enough volunteers.

People dont give the sport of bowls enough credit, i mean, how many sports allow you to concentrate for a total of 60 seconds every 10 minutes and for that other 9 minutes you can stand on the bank with a coldie and sledge the crap out of your team mates.

[TheSneakiness]

Originally Posted by BENT_8

People dont give the sport of bowls enough credit, i mean, how many sports allow you to concentrate for a total of 60 seconds every 10 minutes and for that other 9 minutes you can stand on the bank with a coldie and sledge the crap out of your team mates.

I love this paragraph, knowing me though I'd get competitive and end up making some state team somewhere.

[Ross 1]

[QUOTE=Rapid_Axe;5502021

My issue is being bored. My mind is powerful enough in me that those thoughts do come to front and I need things to distract this, like Xbox, cooking, walking (I walk 6km a day at the moment), cleaning, washing, work, hell anything to keep me focused on a task.[/QUOTE]

Boredom is a risk as it gives your mind time to over analyse everything. I was briefly ocd for cleaning, still am to a certain point. If I wasn't working or spending time with my family, I was cleaning. As bent_8 suggests sport is great, I was too injured to go back to rugby union so I tried boxing, great way to release stress tension. Even if you lose you feel good, have a look if there is any white collar boxing gyms near you, bit of a safer intro to the ring than going straight to a gym with pro fighters, learnt that the hard way when I only lasted two and a bit rounds against a semi pro who was nearly 20 years younger than me.

[supershifty]

A well written article from Cracked.com Basic but true.

I have both anxiety/depression but manage things OK - still go into full lock down mode occasionally to cope with things. Way it is, you guys know what I'm talking about.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-facts-...ut-depression/

Cheers!

[TheSneakiness]

Good thing this has popped back up.

I was seeing a light at the end of the tunnel until Friday night when a lawyer appointed courier rocked up at my place I'm renting and said basically you have two months to get out.

Knowing what is coming up in the next couple of months this has set back a lot of progress I've made the last few weeks.

Guess I just need to contact who I do and see what happens.

[goo33]

Originally Posted by Rapid_Axe

Good thing this has popped back up.

I was seeing a light at the end of the tunnel until Friday night when a lawyer appointed courier rocked up at my place I'm renting and said basically you have two months to get out.

Knowing what is coming up in the next couple of months this has set back a lot of progress I've made the last few weeks.

Guess I just need to contact who I do and see what happens.

Wouldn't worry about it.

A courier is meaningless. Whatever they gave you is irrelevant.

Needs to be a Process Server who serves you with court documents.

If they can't serve you, the process cannot begin.

Wait until you actually get served and then let the court process begin.

Before that happens, get a medical statement saying you have a psychological condition and that should help you get up to at least four adjournments. That way you can push off the eviction for several months.

Also send of a couple of registered letters to the landlord. State that there are problems with the building. Evidence of registered letters initiated by you will go a long way in court and will put the landlord on notice.

Waiver: Information provided here should not be construed as legal advice and no guarantees of actual outcomes are expressed or implied.

[TheSneakiness]

Originally Posted by goo33

Wouldn't worry about it.

A courier is meaningless. Whatever they gave you is irrelevant.

Needs to be a Process Server who serves you with court documents.

If they can't serve you, the process cannot begin.

Wait until you actually get served and then let the court process begin.

Before that happens, get a medical statement saying you have a psychological condition and that should help you get up to at least four adjournments. That way you can push off the eviction for several months.

Also send of a couple of registered letters to the landlord. State that there are problems with the building. Evidence of registered letters initiated by you will go a long way in court and will put the landlord on notice.

Waiver: Information provided here should not be construed as legal advice and no guarantees of actual outcomes are expressed or implied.

It's funny you say that cause my property manager said the same thing. I said umm hang on, I've been getting debt collectors and the like at my place since I moved in and the various government agencies have been chasing the owner. It is a form 19 (mortgagee repossession) filled out from the RTA in QLD so I would assume its legit.

[OzriderXR8]

A mate runs his own blog and site to bring awareness to the 'Black Dog'.

Here is his latest contribution....with the help of a few friends.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msui8IsXPLo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrEQIjYWRvQ

[Grega]

supershifty, i wish i could go into lock down mode. but i have to provide so i have to square that **** away and keep going.

that cracked.com was on the money.

not sure about others, but, i find the ruok bit a little patronising. i understand that people want to appear concerned, but, i really don't want their empathy. sorry if that sounds a bit offputting.

also, the whole, its ok to say its not ok is a bit of a farce. am 100% certain i would not be employed if people knew my struggles.

[BLUEYBA]

Originally Posted by Grega

supershifty, i wish i could go into lock down mode. but i have to provide so i have to square that **** away and keep going.

that cracked.com was on the money.

not sure about others, but, i find the ruok bit a little patronising. i understand that people want to appear concerned, but, i really don't want their empathy. sorry if that sounds a bit offputting.

also, the whole, its ok to say its not ok is a bit of a farce. am 100% certain i would not be employed if people knew my struggles.

I feel the same about the R U OK day. For people with this illness its everyday and I find people saying it more as a joke than being serious about. Anyway that's me. I have never mentioned it to any of my employers as I agree I wouldn't have a job. Could you imagine the looks you'd get if you're having a bad day.

[Grega]

Thanks BlueyBA. Don't want to imagine, my mind is busy enough and I don't want that in there pulling me down :| I try and keep it busy to keep the **** thinking at bay. Doesn't always work though.

Question : Does anyone else really crash hard when Xmas time comes around. I normally have leave around this time not by my choice and I find going from 150% consumed with work to zero messes with me in a really bad way. Xmas 2015 was very dark for me.

[Phildo]

Originally Posted by Grega

Question : Does anyone else really crash hard when Xmas time comes around. I normally have leave around this time not by my choice and I find going from 150% consumed with work to zero messes with me in a really bad way. Xmas 2015 was very dark for me.

I love Christmas time.

Each year, I jump on a plane to Bali. Stuff Kuta, I hire a cheap crap car and go for a drive (ie Suzuki Katana or Jimny).

I've driven around the the outside of Bali, through Bali, etc.

Accommodation is easy to find once you're out of Kuta. It's the quiet season, so everywhere is empty. I use a TomTom GPS with the Southeast Asia map and my iPhone (with various travel apps).

I'm over Bali these days, so I drive up to the Padang Bai ferry port and take the hire car to Lombok (880,000rp, about $A88). Take a few days to drive around the outside of Lombok, plus a few days on the Gili islands.

If you're not into driving then just go to the Gili islands.

I ignore Christmas day and New Year's Eve.

Book the air tickets early on Air Asia (cheapest) so that you can get the front row seats on the plane. This gives plenty of leg room. I get on the plane last, and off first.

I land at midnight and use Google maps and Booking.com or Wotif to have a hotel room selected and booked before I fly out ($A25-30). I get there, sleep and then go hunting for a hire car the next day. The Suzuki Katanas are getting hard to find now, but they are the car to have for driving around Bali or Lombok.

Don't sit around at Christmas and get upset. Pick somewhere cheap to go to and go there.

If you want drinking and clubbing then stick with Kuta.

Make sure that you have an International Driver's Permit before you go. Costs bugger all, but it's a requirement for travel insurance (most people overlook this, but insurance companies don't).

Don't sit around getting bored or upset over Christmas. Have a project or travel destination lined up... something to look forward to.