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Old 31-01-2005, 11:22 AM   #1
Discovery
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Default Monday funny.. for the guys.
14 things a man can do at K-Mart ... while his wife is taking her sweet time:

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Home-wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies rest-room.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: "Code 3 in House wares!" and see what happens.

5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay-by.

6. Move a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department -- and tell other shoppers you're sleeping over; invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bedding Department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why can't you people just leave me ALONE!?!?!?!?"

9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.

10.Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."

11.In the Auto Department, practice your "Madonna look" using different sized funnels.

12. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say: "PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!

13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NOOOOOOOOOOO! It's those voices again!!!"

And last but not least:

14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while, then yell loudly: "There's no toilet paper in here!"
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Old 31-01-2005, 11:31 AM   #2
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rofl, thats bloody hilarious
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Old 31-01-2005, 11:42 AM   #3
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ahhahahaha
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Old 31-01-2005, 11:58 AM   #4
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man are you sure your not two years of age.
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Old 31-01-2005, 12:01 PM   #5
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Hahahahahahahahaha

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Old 31-01-2005, 12:20 PM   #6
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:rofl:
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Old 31-01-2005, 12:33 PM   #7
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Love your work Discovery! Top stuff :1syellow1 :1syellow1 :1syellow1
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Old 31-01-2005, 12:39 PM   #8
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Trail of tomato juice! Golden!
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Old 31-01-2005, 01:16 PM   #9
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Lol @ tomato juice and condoms
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Old 31-01-2005, 02:03 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by !Gn|T|0n
Trail of tomato juice! Golden!
No, that wuld be apple juice! hahahahaha


Top work, Felicity!
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Old 31-01-2005, 02:39 PM   #11
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awsome!!!
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Old 31-01-2005, 02:42 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Discovery
10.Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
SO this is not normal? :ticking:
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Old 31-01-2005, 02:52 PM   #13
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LOL
I read a similar one in a diary at school...
"while holding a knife in (whatever department you find the knifes in :P) ask the store dude if he knows where the antidepressants are"
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Old 31-01-2005, 04:33 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fairmont99
SO this is not normal? :ticking:
Fairmont99.. I would be interested in seeing your 'work'. Am I able to video you doing that to link to the forum? :nutsycuck
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Old 31-01-2005, 04:34 PM   #15
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i saw something like this a while ago on a joke site, except the k-mart was wallmart
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:20 PM   #16
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Done the condom thing to a few friends before, :
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:24 PM   #17
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Hehe nice!
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:41 PM   #18
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I used to love holding my finger over the barcode on condoms at the checkout and making our supervisor call groceries to get a price check....
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:44 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by Feathers
I used to love holding my finger over the barcode on condoms at the checkout and making our supervisor call groceries to get a price check....
Lmfao i can imagine it now
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:45 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Feathers
I used to love holding my finger over the barcode on condoms at the checkout and making our supervisor call groceries to get a price check....
"Price check on Flouro Green Ribbed big mumba 30 pack to register seven please!"
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:56 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Discovery
10.Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
LMAO haha
i have a very clear mind picture of someone i know doing that :
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Old 31-01-2005, 06:57 PM   #22
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It was usually the "extra small" 5pk.

And our grocery guys are really lazy.
They will ask for a product description instead of coming to the checkout right away...

You could see the guys faces visibly fall once they realised what was about to happen... :
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Old 31-01-2005, 07:02 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Feathers
It was usually the "extra small" 5pk.

And our grocery guys are really lazy.
They will ask for a product description instead of coming to the checkout right away...

You could see the guys faces visibly fall once they realised what was about to happen... :
Guys? as in plural? buying condoms! euwwww.. cold shiver at the thought :the_finge
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