Welcome to the Australian Ford Forums forum.

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and inserts advertising. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members, respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features without post based advertising banners. Registration is simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.

Please Note: All new registrations go through a manual approval queue to keep spammers out. This is checked twice each day so there will be a delay before your registration is activated.

Go Back   Australian Ford Forums > General Topics > Non Ford Related Community Forums > The Bar

The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-01-2006, 02:29 PM   #1
MYVYSS
Back where I belong
 
MYVYSS's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Mexico - Victoria
Posts: 947
Default Buying a New Computer - Abbott and Costello

If any of you are thinking of buying a computer soon, this may help you....
You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on... If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?"
might have turned out something like this:

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals and track expenses. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on "START"............

__________________
Regards

Craig
MYVYSS is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 05-01-2006, 05:00 PM   #2
TURBO_GHIA
hmmm boost
 
TURBO_GHIA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: penrith
Posts: 1,684
Default

Hahahah Gold
__________________
EL TURBO GHIA
GT3582R
WOLF3D
TUNED BY JEM
TURBO_GHIA is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 06-01-2006, 07:43 AM   #3
Rodp
Regular Schmuck
 
Rodp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 5,640
Default

That's excellent!
Rodp is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Old 06-01-2006, 07:58 AM   #4
LTDHO
The one and only
 
LTDHO's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Carrum Downs, Victoria
Posts: 9,053
Default

Ha ha ha

So true.

Ok, I'm thristy.
*Presses TAB key


Waiting for can of TAB
__________________
1992 DC LTDHO 360rwkw built by me
Tuned by CVE Performance
Going of the rails on a crazy train
Other cars include Dynamic ED Sprint, Dynamic DL LTD, Sparkling Burgundy DL LTD, Yellow, Red & Blue XB sedan & Black XB Coupe
LTDHO is offline   Reply With Quote Multi-Quote with this Post
Reply


Forum Jump


All times are GMT +11. The time now is 07:38 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Other than what is legally copyrighted by the respective owners, this site is copyright www.fordforums.com.au
Positive SSL