Things you see

Tassie f100 · 13-01-2015, 03:18 PM

A few years ago an old farmer fellow slowly drove his 4x4 hilux into the workshop and asked if I could check his brakes as they were leaking fluid and stopped working.When I investigated i found the pads completely gone and the rotor about 2mm thick.The reason for the leak?.because of no pads and worn out disc the piston had popped out of the calliper.when asked he said oh yeah I.d heard a scraping sort of noise for a few days but thought I,d probably caught a bit of timber up somewhere underneath

Lunch · 13-01-2015, 05:03 PM

I was standing in a queue at a hardware a few years ago when i decided to tune into the conversation between the lady in front of me and the guy behind the counter, she was asking for her money back on a tube of liquid nails, she said it didnt work, apparently she had taken the liquid nails home, used a caulking gun to push the liquid nails out of the tube in the shape of nails, waited for them to dry then attempted to hammer them into timber.

ford71V8 · 13-01-2015, 05:21 PM

haha WTF?!

Bushbasher · 13-01-2015, 05:26 PM

You made that up, how would anyone pick up the Liquid Nails - nail, it'd be stuck to whatever surface it was laid on to.

...like it was nailed there

Lunch · 13-01-2015, 05:36 PM

Like i said, was a few years back, the finer details elude me now but the basic idea was that she thought liquid nails was nails in liquid form in a tube that you made when needed them. 100% honest, the fact that its a glue never occured to her.

Yellow_Festiva · 13-01-2015, 05:56 PM

Yep....

When working in retail I had a long argument with a lady that insisted we sell a cordless drill that NEVER needed charging....

Boss pulled me away and rudely told her we had 'sold out and are never getting them back'.. turns out she was in and out all day asking the same question over and over.

TheSneakiness · 14-01-2015, 12:04 PM

My favourite being on an IT helpdesk is that when you ask the user to send you a screenshot and they send back an image attachment on email of a picture of their monitor.

superyob · 14-01-2015, 01:06 PM

This is second hand information so I don't really know if it was true, but in 1975, I moved with my family to Bougainville Island, east of the Papua New Guinea mainland. After a while I made friends with another kid who lived a couple of houses down and he told me, what I thought up until then, was the funniest thing I had ever heard. It was usual for the white families to hire a house boy or gardener to do some work around the house and there was one particular house boy who had been told to clean the glass louvres somewhere on a house. After a while, the resident of the house could hear strange noises like glass smashing and went to investigate. Apparently the house boy had pulled the louvres out, placed them in the washing machine (most laundries were downstairs) and turned it on...

Trevor 57 · 14-01-2015, 04:05 PM

Many years ago we had been swimming down the river when we got home we had all the wet clothes in a plastic shopping bag, we asked our eldest daughter who was probably around 8 at the time to hang out the bag full of wet clothes, we went outside and here was the plastic bag (with clothes still in it) hanging on the clothes line, we still remind her, she is now 34 with 3 kids of her own

meteoriTE · 14-01-2015, 04:34 PM

This ones a cracker I read on another forum I frequent. Anyway this guy has a mate that owns a speed shop and told him this story. One day a guy comes in asking for big camshaft for his Oldsmobile, so the guy asks him what he was looking for and what was done to the engine. So picks out a cam that he thought would be suitable for what he was after, he told him he'd need to order one in and would let him know when it was in. So it arrives , he calls the guy to let him know it arrived, so the customer picks it and takes it home, no worries. The customer calls him up on the Monday, abusing him and saying he's been ripped off etc, etc. The owner tells him to come down to see if they can see what the problem is. The guy comes down still huffing and puffing and has two cams with him. Anyway the guy puts both cams on the counter saying, that he's been ripped off and that he was told that this cam is a fair bit bigger. So the seller tells him it is and a bit of an argument erupts, the guy then pulls out a tape measure, measures the new one and the old one and says, they're exactly the same ********* size you idiot. No need to tell who ended up being the idiot.
Bloody Americans for you.

marty351 · 14-01-2015, 04:52 PM

Not so much what you see but what you hear...
An old mate who worked in a servo, Harley Davo rides in.
Asks how big is the V8 engine is. Rider replies 'bout 1300cc.
Then says how cool it sounds (thinks its really powerful)
When telling me the story I try to correct him that its only a V-twin and is adamant its a V8, The rider told him so. There are others but cant think of them now.

blueoval · 14-01-2015, 05:20 PM

SMH with some of these stories. haha

They walk among us

Neale · 14-01-2015, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yellow_Festiva

Yep....

When working in retail I had a long argument with a lady that insisted we sell a cordless drill that NEVER needed charging....

Boss pulled me away and rudely told her we had 'sold out and are never getting them back'.. turns out she was in and out all day asking the same question over and over.

She was probably looking for one of these

Madaya · 15-01-2015, 03:08 AM

One of my first retail jobs ~ 1989 was a shop assistant in the auto dept of Big W, which back then was closely linked to the Auto Service garage. Wow, a great job for a budding auto head

The workshop mechanic pulled me out to the garage one evening to check out a utility that had been dropped off for an oil change (aka) lube while Ma and Pa where off doing the shopping.
The Ute was sitting on the deck, he said, 'grab hold of the roo bar and give it a tug'.
So, you tug.
The Ute was flexing, like there was no connection from the engine bay to the cab = total rust.
The mechanic was hesitant to put the Ute on the lift as he was worried the front end would break off.
The customer (farmer) came back and assured us that the ute was just for farm work.
It was a 69 Falcon. It was scary as hell to see a registered vehicle flex like that.

mik · 15-01-2015, 01:10 PM

i remember seeing a car towing a 6 x 4 trailer some years ago with a full size single door fridge on the back , the fridge had a little bald headed feller standing on the back holding the fridge like he was going to stop it moving if the driver hit the brakes

.

**Burnout** · 15-01-2015, 02:49 PM

Was working in retail in NT about 30 years ago, very very outback town. Had the shop open, Saturday arvo. Saw a car being pushed up to the bowsers by half a dozen Abo Blokes, One of whom walked into the shop and asked me to sell him a tin of Hamper Corned Beef. This item I supplied. He paid me and turned the can over, ripped the opening key off the bottom of the tin & walked back out to his mates and the old VE.
They used the key to start the Valiant & drove off quite happily, leaving the can on the counter in front of me.

commodorenutt · 15-01-2015, 04:11 PM

Pulled up at the lights this morning beside a red-p plater in a soft-roader that had no spare on the back, and a near flat LH front.

I put the window down and politely pointed this out to the young 'lady' driver, thinking that in her inexperience, she may not have realised.

Instead of thanks, I got "I'm not f...ing stupid, I f...ing know it's flat, mind your f...ing business."

Luckily she got the green arrow before I got my straight ahead green - she accelerated, went to turn right, and the tyre rolled off the rim & jammed up under the lower control arm, spinning her around about 90 degrees clockwise. It was lucky she didn't roll the thing, as all the weight was over that front corner, and the RH rear lifted a good foot off the road during the spin.

After she spun, I then saw the stoved-in front, and the spare on the RH front. She'd obviously ploughed into (or over) something bad enough to wreck both front tyres.

Ironically, cops were waiting at the adjacent red light, and saw it all unfold in front of them. No way of lying her way out of it now.....

marty351 · 15-01-2015, 04:38 PM

^^^^ Ahhhh... poetic justice. Must have been a good laugh!

ford71V8 · 15-01-2015, 05:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trevor 57

Many years ago we had been swimming down the river when we got home we had all the wet clothes in a plastic shopping bag, we asked our eldest daughter who was probably around 8 at the time to hang out the bag full of wet clothes, we went outside and here was the plastic bag (with clothes still in it) hanging on the clothes line, we still remind her, she is now 34 with 3 kids of her own

Bunch of us kids were left alone for the afternoon at an aunts place.....the older kids to help look after the younger ones. My sister, about 8, went to make my cousin an egg sandwich. Came back with egg on bread....yep, cracked and simply wiped across

She was also known for questioning how the man driving that van could manage since he is blind. Huh? We then saw the business name on the van, it was a blinds and curtain company.
She never did get much smarter either

blueoval · 15-01-2015, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by commodorenutt

Pulled up at the lights this morning beside a red-p plater in a soft-roader that had no spare on the back, and a near flat LH front.

I put the window down and politely pointed this out to the young 'lady' driver, thinking that in her inexperience, she may not have realised.

Instead of thanks, I got "I'm not f...ing stupid, I f...ing know it's flat, mind your f...ing business."

Luckily she got the green arrow before I got my straight ahead green - she accelerated, went to turn right, and the tyre rolled off the rim & jammed up under the lower control arm, spinning her around about 90 degrees clockwise. It was lucky she didn't roll the thing, as all the weight was over that front corner, and the RH rear lifted a good foot off the road during the spin.

After she spun, I then saw the stoved-in front, and the spare on the RH front. She'd obviously ploughed into (or over) something bad enough to wreck both front tyres.

Ironically, cops were waiting at the adjacent red light, and saw it all unfold in front of them. No way of lying her way out of it now.....

You did the right thing notifying her of the tire. Usually you have some undercover video from ACA or TT filming people going past ignoring her claiming nobody cares for women in distress. lol

How hard is it to wave and say thanks, rather than hurl abuse to passersby?

Bushbasher · 15-01-2015, 06:19 PM

Just an hour ago was on the way home from Port Lincoln and spied what looked like an original survivor John Goss Special coming towards me in emerald Fire over white. Just as I was thinking " Hm, nice original car, well done for keeping it going", I caught a glimpse of a rear wing as it went by and looking in the rear view mirror I see a stupid high rise wing from what appeared to be a VS GTS, or something of that ilk, bolted to the boot.

It was just so wrong on so many levels all I just shook my head and thought - "YOU DIK-ED"

Geez Louise · 15-01-2015, 07:46 PM

Few weeks back I bought a new laptop for the boss at work (New fandangled thing that has a touch screen) and set it up for him. We all have dual monitors at work so I set one screen so he could read his emails and the other for applications he needs to open.

Nek mimut... all kinds of cussin' and puffin' coming from his office. Go in to see what all the fuss was about. He looks at me and tells me there is something wrong with the laptop.

I say ok, tell me what's the issue. There he is....swiping his fingers across the screen and NOTHING was moving.

After I have finished laughing....I said to him...Ummm try the OTHER screen. The one you are fiercely nearly putting your fingers through is your old monitor that is NOT touch screen.

He just gave me a very sheepish look and said..."oh...Sorry".

Cheers
Col

**GasoLane** · 15-01-2015, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Geez Louise

After I have finished laughing....I said to him...Ummm try the OTHER screen. The one you are fiercely nearly putting your fingers through is your old monitor that is NOT touch screen.

He just gave me a very sheepish look and said..."oh...Sorry".

Cheers
Col

Of course the sad part here is that he was being shown how to use a PC by ........................ a Girl !!

Geez Louise · 15-01-2015, 09:11 PM

Ooooo....thems is fighting words. Don't make me grab my paddlin stick ya young whipper snapper!

Cheers
Col

staity · 15-01-2015, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueoval

How hard is it to wave and say thanks, rather than hurl abuse to passersby?

Had a similar thing in a car park, was driving around looking for a spot when i noticed something fall out of a womans bag. being the nice person i am i rolled down the window and said "Excuse me" and before i could tell her she dropped something she spun around and shouted "Im not leaving so dont ask for my ********** spot".

Quick as a flash I replied " well actually I was going to tell you that you dropped something but if want to to a complete B***H to me, I Won't" And drove off before she could say anything baqck.

I Thought what a cow didnt give me a chance to say something before she basicly told me to ****** off.

2011G6E · 15-01-2015, 10:27 PM

Back in the glorious days in the late 1980's of "badge engineering" among car makers, I was standing in an Autobarn talking to the manager, who I knew. Someone came up to the counter and wanted a rear window louvre (remember them...) for a "Toyota Lexcen". He went and got one off the shelf, but the buyer noticed it said "Suit VN/VP Commodore". He said "No, I want one for a Toyota Lexcen, not a Commodore". Mate tried to tell him that it was the exact same car apart from badges. No, that wasn't right, guy was adamant it was for a Toyota, not a Holden.

Mate went out the back to "see if they had any in stock"...came back five minutes later and said that luckily he'd found one.

You probably guessed he just went out back and peeled the sticker off a "VN/VP" one and then gave the unmarked louvre to the now-happy customer...

WoodyAU · 15-01-2015, 10:45 PM

Boy, didn't I get a blank look at super cheap last year when I asked for a rear louvre for the 2003 Nissan Pulsar Mum just bought. I didn't know they stopped making them 15 yrs ago!
I also saw someone in the back of a truck holding the furniture in whilst they moved house. He ended up on the road with the mirror glass from the wardrobe shattered around him. Another time I saw an upright piano fall from the back of a ute- it was not tied on.