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The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat |
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20-07-2016, 02:25 PM | #1 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Perth, Northern Suburbs
Posts: 5,005
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Hi, I'm new here and my car is broken.
I would like you to fix it using the magic of the internet. Obviously I am not going to tell you what type of car it is, or what's wrong with it, that's where the magic part comes in. Nor can you derive any clue from the location of my post, since naturally I have done my best to put it in the least relevant forum. I have either checked everything, or checked nothing. (See Schrödinger's Cat for more explanation.) Please don't suggest any tests, because obviously they won't work. Again, magic is the key here. Please don't bore me with explanations. I have no interest in learning about my car, nor even the most basic concepts of mechanics and/or physics. However I am more than happy to complain about any professionals who attempt to help me. I am extremely angry about this. My car is only 20 years old so this is clear evidence that all cars are **** and I should be entitled to compensation. If you cannot magically fix my car I am going to run it over with a tank. |
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12 users like this post: |
20-07-2016, 02:29 PM | #2 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Barossa Valley, South Australia
Posts: 3,381
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Just hit it on the headlight and go "Eeeyyyyyyyyyy" like the Fonz, then it should be all good to go again!
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Cheers, Sam. |
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7 users like this post: |
20-07-2016, 02:47 PM | #3 | ||||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: perth
Posts: 4,355
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you missed a line
Quote:
Quote:
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yes still (as money n time permit) doing the rebuilding the zh fairlane with a clevo 400m 4v heads injected whipple blown with aode 4 speed trans to a 9" ....... we'll get there eventually just remember don't be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark...Professionals built the Titanic! I have taken up meditation... at least it's better than sitting around doing nothing !! |
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20-07-2016, 02:51 PM | #4 | |||
Miami Pilot
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: ACT
Posts: 21,703
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Quote:
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The Hammer: FG GTE | 376rwkw | 1/4 mile 11.793 @ 119.75mph 1.733 60' (4408lb) 1 of 60 FG MK1 335 GTEs (1 of 118 FG Mk 1 & 2 335 GTEs). Mods: Tune, HSD/ShockWorks, black GT335 19” staggered replicas with 245 & 275/35/19 Michelin Pilot sport 5s Daily: BF2 Fairmont Ghia I6 ZF, machine face GT335 19” staggered Replicas with 245s and 275s, Bilsteins & Kings FPV 335 build stats: <click here> Ford Performance Club ACT |
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20-07-2016, 02:57 PM | #5 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Perth, Northern Suburbs
Posts: 5,005
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6 users like this post: |
20-07-2016, 03:27 PM | #7 | ||
Banned
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 2,811
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20-07-2016, 04:18 PM | #8 | |||
Thailand Specials
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Centrefold Lounge
Posts: 49,437
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Quote:
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20-07-2016, 05:57 PM | #10 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: perth
Posts: 4,355
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not much just a few bored blokes doing very little today (including me)
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yes still (as money n time permit) doing the rebuilding the zh fairlane with a clevo 400m 4v heads injected whipple blown with aode 4 speed trans to a 9" ....... we'll get there eventually just remember don't be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark...Professionals built the Titanic! I have taken up meditation... at least it's better than sitting around doing nothing !! |
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2 users like this post: |
20-07-2016, 06:27 PM | #11 | ||
Budget Racer
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 2,421
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If you guys have nothing to add can you stop with the off topic posts?
My car is broken too and I'm hopeful some of the magic will come my way. I'm positive I have the same problem as the OP.
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12.1@112Mph 285rwkw on n2o Cleveland Power |
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20-07-2016, 06:50 PM | #12 | ||
Kicking back
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Western sydney
Posts: 8,675
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Its probably a case that needs lateral thinking. Shame it's not mains powered or run through a data network, because those are my profession. Maybe (on the illicit side) try some acid or shrooms and sit in a stationary car, and it will drive (to you atleast) like the day it was delivered. It might be a case of finding a competent mechanic, surely they aren't too hard to find.
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20-07-2016, 06:53 PM | #13 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Perth, Northern Suburbs
Posts: 5,005
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I don't think I could do your job.
I can only imagine the customers you must get: "My car don't go, I have no idea what's wrong with it, I expect you to spend hours figuring that out and do it for free. Once you have figured out which part needs replacing, I'll happily pay for the part, but only if you fix it today, and I'll only pay the price of a dodgy eBay part from China. Oh, and your free coffee sucks, and you need some better magazines." |
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20-07-2016, 06:53 PM | #14 | ||
HUGH JARSE
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Yap-Hoon
Posts: 21,803
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Sell your broken car to me.
This will solve your problem of owning a broken car. QED Cav |
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20-07-2016, 06:56 PM | #15 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: perth
Posts: 4,355
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have you checked the air in the spare tyre , generally if the ambiance temp of the humidity in the glove box mixes with the positivity of the negative flow of the radiator hoses in the boot well of the car 3 houses away arnt aliened with the posties return addresses your problem will be 31
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yes still (as money n time permit) doing the rebuilding the zh fairlane with a clevo 400m 4v heads injected whipple blown with aode 4 speed trans to a 9" ....... we'll get there eventually just remember don't be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark...Professionals built the Titanic! I have taken up meditation... at least it's better than sitting around doing nothing !! |
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This user likes this post: |
20-07-2016, 07:07 PM | #16 | |||
Budget Racer
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 2,421
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Quote:
Sorry to the OP for the high jack.
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12.1@112Mph 285rwkw on n2o Cleveland Power |
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20-07-2016, 07:10 PM | #17 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Bunbury WA
Posts: 1,409
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Yeah, of course, the air pressure in my spare is a bit low. With ya's bros. Perhaps we should be given a shot of esp then all would be well.
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2010 FG XR6 I6 CC Ute, Nitro colour. lsd, sports suspension, Ford 18's fitted with Michelin Primacy 3 ST 245x45x18, MW Quick Shifter, Pacemaker 4500 Extractors, Carbuilders Soundproofing, KPM Street Fighter CAI |
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20-07-2016, 07:12 PM | #18 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Sausage Singlet NSW
Posts: 3,301
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I was expecting this was another post by Hulk but .....
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20-07-2016, 07:18 PM | #19 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 2,693
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Just tip it on its side. With motorbikes it fixes just about everything.
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20-07-2016, 07:20 PM | #20 | ||
FF.Com.Au Hardcore
Join Date: May 2005
Location: In my shed
Posts: 5,066
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2 users like this post: |