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Old 17-03-2021, 11:43 AM   #31
marty351
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

Well, let me say this. With how close this lady is to her cousin, and a new man was to enter into a romantic relationship with her, who is the 3rd wheel here?
I've had a relationship with a girl who was obsessed with hanging out with her best friend practically everyday. I would be invited over to her house all the time, at the beginning I thought it was great.
A long weekend was coming up and I wanted to go up country for a bit of RnR with her, but suprise suprise, she had already booked a flight to Sydney with her friend. I was asked if I'd like to go with them and be stuck with whatever they had planned, I politely declined and responded that I didn't want to be a 3rd wheel and get in their way, she was fine with that, and then I realised that I would always be the third wheel, at least for the foreseeable future anyway.
Not even one phonecall for the entire weekend, and when she arrived back home, didn't even call to ask how my weekend was.
I never called her, and two days later when she did, I didn't even bother to answer.

So, in summary, four months of being the 3rd wheel is all I was.
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Old 17-03-2021, 12:56 PM   #32
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

It was suggested to me that this thread reminded them of this now defunct Melbourne newspaper, especially the 'Heartbalm' section

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Old 17-03-2021, 01:28 PM   #33
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

Good old Snedden; a textbook example of biology at play.
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Old 17-03-2021, 01:35 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesa View Post
On the flip side, I steer clear of anyone who calls others soyboys/cucks and whose only instructions on how to be a man is to be a raging meatbag of uncontrolled testosterone whenever they think their masculinity is in question.

I think you'll find that kind of facade is quite thin and usually employed by delicate men who explode at the mere thought of looking weak, showing empathy, touching anything pink or basically doing anything outside of the narrow boundaries of what it means to "be a real man."

What actually grew tired long ago is the perpetually triggered projecting their emotionally charged preconceived ideas on everyday scenarios to create oppressors and victims, the guilty and the innocent. These emotions sees facts, logic and due process being thrown out the window in favour of hierarchical left wing identity politics.

Believe it or not, most everyday ideas, decisions, actions and the outcomes of such are more innocent or well intended than you’d like them to be. Not being able to cognitively distinguish variations between black and white sees wild theoretical accusations like yours above.

The irony behind your post is you call out toxic masculinity preventing men speaking out.
Yet OP has out of naivety, curiosity, lack of experience or knowledge come on here to anonymously ask a question that is playing on his mind only to be told by some feminist he is a potential domestic abuser.
Well **** me, no wonder men don’t want to speak up or ask questions.

Anyway. She might be stalling OP. Keeping him at length and considers him more of a brother. In which case.

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Old 17-03-2021, 01:45 PM   #35
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

Quote:
Originally Posted by leesa View Post
If you're referring to my comment in the other thread about guys being called cucks who might want to lower their estrogen and get a testosterone shot... for wanting to be vaccinated of all bloody things... the behaviour opposite of that is a pretty fair idea.

It's not unmanly to do things outside of confines of the stereotypical definition of a brutish man. The colour pink is not kryptonite, delicate men almost think their dick will fall off if they touch anything pink. Often they'll grab pink objects with as few fingers as possible if they have to pick it up, as if they're carrying someone else's snotty tissue.

Don't listen to the toxic version of what it means to "be a real man". There are plenty of ways to be a man and being anything less than a brute who never shows fear is not (in my personal opinion) one of them. Plenty of men commit suicide because of the bull**** society tells them about being a man and if they don't shape up to that character then they're obviously gay and may aswell off themselves. Hike up your skirt, take a spoon full of concrete and harden up, don't ever cry, don't ever show any semblance of emotion or empathy, yadda yadda. We've all heard it. It basically says that you have to play a role your entire life and can't be a human being that feels emotion and is able to express it, and it's very damaging. If you google around, you will see that it is involved in the rates of men's suicide.

All that aside, I don't actually think and didn't say that what OP has said is toxic masculinity. But there are glimpses there that show some (possibly low, who knows) signs of possessiveness and suspicion and those things aren't healthy for relationships. I am not accusing the OP of this, but if you've ever had domestic violence in your life then you start to see some patterns in other people that can be early indicators of what a woman is up for if she ends up in that relationship. It's not something you go looking for, they just start to stand out in people and unfortunately possessiveness is one of them. Often people don't even realise it's happening, but it destroys relationships (and sometimes lives) and if it can be nipped in the bud then I think OP will be a happier (and emotionally healthier) person for it.
It's not just men either, I've had some unhealthy relationships in the past and looking back on them I wasn't even really aware of why I got upset at some of the things I did.

So to clarify, incase people see your comment and think I'm accusing OP of toxic masculinity (or domestic violence for that matter), no I'm not. But being weird about a chick hanging out with her guy cousin, and having it throw off BS radars and red flags, that's not real right either. Single women are allowed to hang out with men. I'd even argue that women in relationships are allowed to hang out with men but that's a different discussion. Does it really qualify for people saying "RUN" because this chick is hanging out with her male cousin?? Hell, this woman is even going out with a RELATIVE and it's still making OP suspicious. Why?? What do you think is actually going on, OP?
This is what misandry looks like. Why do you hate men so much?
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Old 17-03-2021, 02:25 PM   #36
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

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It was suggested to me that this thread reminded them of this now defunct Melbourne newspaper, especially the 'Heartbalm' section

image
Good Old Sonia McMahon was Far Too much for Billy to handle.......
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Old 17-03-2021, 03:11 PM   #37
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Good Old Sonia McMahon was Far Too much for Billy to handle.......
way to go @ 80yrs after the rumours of being a "p oof"
That stoopid Gordon Elliott now thats a flash back as well.

OK call me whatever male you wish but smoo's is post of the year
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Old 17-03-2021, 03:21 PM   #38
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

Billy McMahon (not Snedden):

I was one of those kids politicians wished they never met. Brought to the front of a Liberal by-election rally when he was railing against EGW’s Labor, because I was blonde-haired and articulate for a kid.

What did I ask him? “Mr McMahon, why did you lose the election?”
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Old 17-03-2021, 07:57 PM   #39
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

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Originally Posted by leesa View Post
Don't listen to the toxic version of what it means to "be a real man".
There is no toxic version, there's simply aspects of normal male behaviour that are not female-like, and have been singled out as necessary to eradicate. The question is, why dont men get a say in what's good for them?

Quote:
Plenty of men commit suicide because of the bull**** society tells them about being a man
Society is 50% female... so a not insignificant amount of that bull**** comes from females. How much of our self worth comes from trying to attract a female, then provide for her and keep her safe?
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Old 17-03-2021, 08:28 PM   #40
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Originally Posted by Citroënbender View Post
I briefly dated a second cousin, nearly twenty years ago. It was mostly mutual physical attraction. We figured that due to one of us being adopted, there was no genetic link, the only “risk” was opprobrium.
he he he

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Old 17-03-2021, 08:40 PM   #41
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Old 17-03-2021, 10:54 PM   #42
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Originally Posted by smoo View Post
The irony behind your post is you call out toxic masculinity preventing men speaking out.
Yet OP has out of naivety, curiosity, lack of experience or knowledge come on here to anonymously ask a question that is playing on his mind only to be told by some feminist he is a potential domestic abuser.
Well **** me, no wonder men don’t want to speak up or ask questions.
I claimed nothing about toxic masculinity in this thread relating to OP's scenario. Go back and read it again.

But yes, I brought up the connections to possessiveness and possible eventual domestic abuse because it is a thing and we all need more awareness of it. It's not a comfortable topic but the only way to normalise it for discussion is to include it in conversation.
 
Old 17-03-2021, 11:17 PM   #43
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There is no toxic version, there's simply aspects of normal male behaviour that are not female-like, and have been singled out as necessary to eradicate.
What do you think about quotes like the below? Nothing wrong with it?

Quote:
You cucks lining up for the vaccine.... might want to lower you're estrogen levels and get a testosterone shot.
 
Old 17-03-2021, 11:36 PM   #44
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesa View Post
I claimed nothing about toxic masculinity in this thread relating to OP's scenario.
Yes, it was my post that brought across that phrase (from the COVID-19 thread) as serious inquiry, not simply to s***-stir.
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Old 17-03-2021, 11:55 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leesa View Post
What do you think about quotes like the below? Nothing wrong with it?
I've never been a big fan of policing what other people say or think. I'll happily debate a point with someone, but censor them? That's a pretty regressive position IMO.
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Old 18-03-2021, 07:28 AM   #46
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Default Re: Wierd Situation - Women

Not a surprise leesa is dismissive of all this. Women love the idea of having a male 'best friend' & throwing guilt trips at their partner if he dare question it.

I had the same thing happen to me, & I went ballistic when I found out this situation existed. Not until over 2 years later by chance I had access to her Google history on another unlocked device, I could see she was hoping for more, and that's if it didn't already happen......

My advice is to let it go and stay away
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