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Old 01-08-2015, 10:10 AM   #61
Muzz Landau
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

My Dad is the master of telling a tall story.
he always says, "Never let the truth get in the way of a good story!"
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Old 02-08-2015, 05:54 AM   #62
marty351
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

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Originally Posted by Muzz Landau View Post
My Dad is the master of telling a tall story.
he always says, "Never let the truth get in the way of a good story!"
Thats a great saying.
It's also the politicians first rule.
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Old 02-08-2015, 10:11 AM   #63
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

"I'm just going to give birth to the Prime Minister" as a way of informing others about having a crap.
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Old 02-08-2015, 05:58 PM   #64
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

In the car: Dad: "Anyone smell petrol?"
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While the basic Ford Six was code named Barra, the Turbo version clearly deserved its very own moniker – again enter Gordon Barfield.
We asked him if the engine had actually been called “Seagull” and how that came about.
“Actually it was just call “Gull”, because I named it that. Because we knew it was going to poo on everything”.
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Old 02-08-2015, 08:15 PM   #65
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

A couple ive heard over the years;

Going to drop the Cosbys off at the pool

Parking the big brown buick in the porcelain garage

A fart is just a *urd telegram

Second hole from the back of the neck
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Old 04-08-2015, 05:52 PM   #66
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

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In the car: Dad: "Anyone smell petrol?"
Hahaha, im guessing thats after he locked the windows?
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Old 05-08-2015, 04:01 PM   #67
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

Typically my kids used to come in with skinned knees, elbows, etc.. I would always clean it up, wipe their tears and tell 'em, "It will grow back".
Now the pair of 'em are as hard as nails.
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While the basic Ford Six was code named Barra, the Turbo version clearly deserved its very own moniker – again enter Gordon Barfield.
We asked him if the engine had actually been called “Seagull” and how that came about.
“Actually it was just call “Gull”, because I named it that. Because we knew it was going to poo on everything”.
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Old 24-08-2015, 04:44 PM   #68
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

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When I was young and did something dumb my old man used to say "Use your Richard Cranium!"
Didn't realise back then that he was calling me a dick head hahaha.

A lot of my fun childhood memories are of the musical farts my old man used to trumpet out all the time to my mums disgust.

Now my young boys and I have a lot of laughs with all my fart jokes and dad jokes. To my wife's disgust haha.
There is something eternally funny about the back passage rush of wind. I still almost need hospitalisation from laughing after a good fart joke or movie scene...
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Old 24-08-2015, 05:13 PM   #69
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

/\ The 'beans scene' from Blazing Saddles.
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While the basic Ford Six was code named Barra, the Turbo version clearly deserved its very own moniker – again enter Gordon Barfield.
We asked him if the engine had actually been called “Seagull” and how that came about.
“Actually it was just call “Gull”, because I named it that. Because we knew it was going to poo on everything”.
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Old 25-08-2015, 12:21 PM   #70
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Default Re: Dad-ism's...We all have one!

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Originally Posted by monzie View Post
The more mature members will remember when it cost a penny to use public loo's [spend a penny] and this little ditty was one my dad always trotted out.

Here I sit brokenhearted, paid a penny and only farted
Here I sit very thankfull. paid a penny and did a tankfull.

As a youngster I had some very close calls with no money in my pocket.
I must have had an updated version -
Here I sit brokenhearted, tried to **** but only farted
Dads in the army, mums in the marines, i'm on the toilet bombing submarines


Going to a restaurant with the kids, one was about 2 yers old, the waitress would ask me if I needed a high chair, always say no thanks, i'll just sit here. Older kids and wife roll their eyes, waitress probably heard it a thousand times.

Kids running around in the house, bang into say the coffee table and hurt themselves, i'll straight away ask if the coffee table is ok in a concerned voice. The older kids turned the tables and use it on me now, cheeky buggers
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