the "ridiculous things ppl have told you" thread - Page 5

ltd · 23-10-2006, 10:47 PM

I can't believe I forgot this one, a loser I know says that 'fergie' from the black eyed peas isn't hot.
I'm guessing Anthony Callea is more his style.

[Tonko] · 23-10-2006, 11:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ltd

I can't believe I forgot this one, a loser I know says that 'fergie' from the black eyed peas isn't hot.
I'm guessing Anthony Callea is more his style.

but the whole, fergie p|ssing herself on stage is a bit of a turn off...

Envi XR8 · 24-10-2006, 12:12 AM

first of all, I want to say I have sitting here p*ssin myself laughing at these posts......man made my night! some of the people we all know!!???

Here's a few I have heard...

These couple go back a while and are from the same guy. Ol' mate reckons
1)he has a Full Factory spec BMW rally car that drives around near his auntie's farm.
2)He also converted a bolt action .22 to fully automatic that fires an incredible 7000 rounds a minute, and he uses it too hunt rabbits.
3)He also reckons Darwin Stubbies are worth $10,000, and $15,000 if they are cold.
4)He was also a ninja in Vietnam with the Navy seals, and he was shot in the forehead during a fire fight

Some others....

A good mate of mine swore that a car with an auto couldn't do a burn out. he reckoned to do a burnout you had to have a clutch.

Another mate when he got his VN, when it was about 2 years old, said he couldn't do a burn out because his car had 4 wheel disc brakes and the traction control would cut in and stop the car. He also said he spent $4,500 on engine modification but "didn't bother with the computer or getting it tuned cause it didn't matter"

Another guy I used to know swore that in the mid 70's Ford made a special 4 speed C4 for bathurst that even the Ford pit crew didn't know about until they dyno'ed the car before the race and it shifted into 4th gear. When I asked about the gear shifter, he said, "nah it was an auto, like a T-bar"

Someone else I knew reckoned he put a stall converter onto a manual and turned it into a semi automatic, that he could use the clutch to launch at the drag strip, but change gears manully with no clutch.

When I was working for an engine parts supplier this guy came in to buy some stuff for his 308 HQ. HUGE Solid cam, lifters, 11;1 lumpys, moly rings, roller rockers etc, big holley etc. He said he was mating it to a 4200-4400 stally, 4.11 spooled 9" rear end. When I asked him what he was aiming for (in regard to times on the quarter) he answered " it all for the wife's car so she can take the kids to school"

the best one was this guy I know was building an engine and this plonker came in. He starting going on about the brand of pistons my mate was using. He said to plonker yeah they aren;t bad nothing to write home about. plonker said," no mate those STD pistons are best you can get. Everyone uses them!!"

cheers all, thanks for the laugh

b2tf · 24-10-2006, 12:22 AM

A painter I just happened to walk past today, saw the AFD posters in my hand and started rattling on about how a mate of his has an escort with a BA XR6T motor in it.

When i offered an entry form - "nah mate,he doesnt drive it cos all the coppers know about it".

Of course.

MAFIA · 24-10-2006, 01:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Firefox7

Pulled into a garage one day to put some fuel in my car, and another motorist walked up and said "wow thats a nice ferrari" is it their latest one out

_ ....he was dead serious too.

Cheers

Hahaha that GOLDThis post is a laugh and a half!

:

Same things happen to me. Filling up and middle age guy come up to me an says this in one sentence before i could answer back to anything "Wow nice car, is that the new BMW? Damn why has it got ford Bagde on it?" An he was serious,

: i never laugh so hard that scared this bloke off! haha It made my day.

Joes_meat · 24-10-2006, 01:41 AM

A friend of a friend of mine had a 92 or 93 4-door Charade.

It had an exhaust (sounded like a straight through), pink wipers, bonnet scoops and best of all a huge RALLIART sticker plasted accross the rear window.

Another mate of mine said he had a Celica that spat flames out the exhaust at the press of a button. (Unfortunately for this thread, it was true.)

phat_stak_tipa · 24-10-2006, 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GRNKPR

a fair bit of it comes from these forums as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOLD ^^^^^ VERY TRUE

troppo · 24-10-2006, 06:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Envi XR8

3)He also reckons Darwin Stubbies are worth $10,000, and $15,000 if they are cold.

Give him my number, I'd be more than happy to keep him stocked, preferably with coldies.

ltd · 24-10-2006, 07:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TonkoXR8

but the whole, fergie p|ssing herself on stage is a bit of a turn off...

Agreed, that sort of dented the fantasy a bit didn't it? You'd have hope if it was an accident but she admitted doing it freely. That's way grotty, and I don't think I've heard of any celebrity wetting themselves in public before. Anyway, this mate said it before the IP freely incident.

flappist · 24-10-2006, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ltd

Agreed, that sort of dented the fantasy a bit didn't it? You'd have hope if it was an accident but she admitted doing it freely. That's way grotty, and I don't think I've heard of any celebrity wetting themselves in public before. Anyway, this mate said it before the IP freely incident.

Christina Amphlette had been known to do it too.....

ltd · 24-10-2006, 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flappist

Christina Amphlette had been known to do it too.....

And at Australian Made she wore such small skirts - glad that never made the video. Just think of that song; "I don't want anybody else, when I think about you I wet myself"

Mitch_ · 24-10-2006, 06:35 PM

at school some kid was looking at "fulli sick" cars...and he scrolled over a prelude...and someone said "whats that?" his reply...supra... i'm like "your joking rite? its a prelude" he then replied with "your just jealous i'm looking at holdens rather than fords (yea his a holden bogun)" and he was looking at a izusu rodeo...i then said "ummm...thats an izusu" he then asked the teacher, and a whole lot of other people trying to back him up that its a holden...but everyone said i was rite :P funny as....prolby had to be there :P

XR8-260 · 24-10-2006, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2kool4u

tis believable, i've been 210 as a passenger in a mates vn, still had a bit left in it too.

A VN V8 manual could probably do 220 unless it was electronically limted...

Even my mums 125kw 5spd auto Merc E240 can just do 220kph so a VN should easily do it.

XR8-260 · 24-10-2006, 06:59 PM

My mate reckons he did 220kph in his mum's 4cyl camry altise. I don't know whether to beleive him or not. He told me he was going down a hill though

Joes_meat · 25-10-2006, 01:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 30487256

My mate reckons he did 220kph in his mum's 4cyl camry altise. I don't know whether to beleive him or not. He told me he was going down a hill though

The manual four-cylinder Camry's have a surprisingly high top end. I wouldn't be surprised if the top speed is 200+.

Outbackjack · 25-10-2006, 01:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joes_meat

The manual four-cylinder Camry's have a surprisingly high top end. I wouldn't be surprised if the top speed is 200+.

Its a brave individual that takes a toyota camry anywhere past 140!!!

XR8-260 · 25-10-2006, 01:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joes_meat

The manual four-cylinder Camry's have a surprisingly high top end. I wouldn't be surprised if the top speed is 200+.

It's an auto... In any other circumstance I would not believe my mate but going down a hill changes things i suppose

:

XR8-260 · 25-10-2006, 01:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AU-MUSTD

When buying wifes subaru sales lady told me how reliable boxer engines are because they dont have a sump and the rings are constantly laying flat in the engine oil.

She then went on to tell me not to buy a territory because the suspension/ chassis were a 15 year old design just with a new top and they drive horrible :nutsycuck
Love not calling them on it so they can make a fool of themselves to many more people. Her name was paris too!!!

Don't ever listen to a sales LADY!!! Lol...

Ruger · 25-10-2006, 07:15 AM

i was talking to a guy who just got back from NZ apparently he had he fastest 300zx in nz.... rubbish
this is his claim "It ran 7.1 on street tyres, that was just with the twin turbos and nitrous and the supercharger wasnt even on!" "Its running the stock twin turbos and a supercharger as well - the switch ones and has 300hp shot of NOS"
this same fella has made many silly claims along the lines of "i own the first superman comic ever made" just to name one.

70caprigt3k · 25-10-2006, 05:45 PM

Heres another one i thought of today and this bloke who was a friend of mines dad was dead serious:

The bloke: Yeah, No manufacturer in the US makes rear wheel drive cars anymore.
Me: Uhhhhh Ok.
The bloke: They are all front wheel drive
Me: Ok, what about the Ford GT, Chrysler 300c, Chrysler Charger, Ford Mustang and F-trucks.
The bloke: The F Truck isn't a car so they are still RWD but the rest are FWD
Me: So your telling me that Ford U.S.A's flagship performance model that is notoriously rear engined rear wheel drive is front wheel drive?
The bloke: Yeah.
Me: If you say so mate.

Sprint_ED · 25-10-2006, 05:52 PM

heres a laugh

MATE: altease holden is Aussie Owned
Me: dude, there owned by chev
Mate: noo they just get parts from em
Me: holden are just like ford, offshore operations but holden has diffrent name, like vauxhall and opel
Mate: ur full of it

Me : Rings holden enquiries and he hears it from them

Mate: they must not know about it then

16wantsI6 · 25-10-2006, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 30487256

A VN V8 manual could probably do 220 unless it was electronically limted...

Even my mums 125kw 5spd auto Merc E240 can just do 220kph so a VN should easily do it.

yeah serious mate i have been in a V6 VN commodore doing 215kph maybe even more, i couldnt tell because i was looking from the passenger seat.
and ill tell you its not very fun either.... could fall apart any second!

TwistedEL · 25-10-2006, 08:24 PM

Was he in the VN that wrapped itself around a tree on Roe Hwy? Or was it Tonkin Hwy? Or Manning Rd?

We have seen the end of many a stupid driver driving many a crappy car. Way too many lately.

16wantsI6 · 25-10-2006, 08:48 PM

i know, nah he hasnt wrapped himself up yet but i wouldnt be suprised, i wasnt really saying much when he was doin it, it was late at night and i had had a few to drink so i just shut up and watched. 160km around bends on the wrong side of the road at night in a VN is the scariest think ive experienced, only think as scary is being in a landcruiser ute doin 130 around a bend.
i think i just named all of the most dangerous things to do with driving in one sentence, especially the VN part.

TwistedEL · 25-10-2006, 09:17 PM

still OT but did you see / hear about the upside down 4wd on the wrong side of tonkin hwy the other night? I went through not long after it happened and they were still cleaning it up 2.5 hrs later
Woman driving it didn't stand a chance. Not sure how but that is the second car to end up on the wrong side of the road at that bend... I can't see any reason why when it's only a slight bend and there is a very decent median in the middle

fullysick1 · 25-10-2006, 09:52 PM

a guy i worked with years ago was going on about how beastie his mates rs2000 motor is fully worked and it idles at 2000rpm wait til he runs it in he said. and another classic was a f100 at car city years ago had a 460 big block in it anyway salesman was telling me it needed to be taken for a good thrash because the old guy that owned it before never thrashed it and it had built up a lip on the bores thats why it was running a bit rough

XR8putts · 25-10-2006, 10:28 PM

A guy from uni maintains that Ford have built and sell BA GTHOs.

:

He just won't listen. And to 'prove' that it exists, he took a picture of the (some car) "GTHO"'s rego sticker on his cellphone, instead of one of the car. I had a bet with him for $50 bucks, we went to the local Ford/FPV dealer who said no there isn't a BA GTHO (the last GTHO as we know was like in the 70's?).. and he still hasn't paid me my $50.

I told him that it was probably some guy who put stickers on his Falcon, but no, he informs me it was from Factory.

We believe he has a tumor as he yells random things in lectures and smells things that just arn't around. He also stomps on girls feet and maintains that he actually paid for this hat he wears, which was clearly a free giveaway.

He's also a 20year old virgin.

Tiapan · 26-10-2006, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TuMor

I was waiting outside a part one night, and looking at a neat looking covered up torana on this driveway. I was talking to this kid who says its his uncles torana, and that it will be given to him when he turns 18. It was a tidy car from what i could see, i asked what it had under the bonnet...and it started.

He said it was a v8, yeah i could believe that...as well as it was a 308ci v8. Now he went on to say it had a blowoff valve and an intercooler, i asked "is that because its turboed?" He said, "Yeah, but not a single..its got twin turbos, and its supercharged"...and the ИИИИ just kept on coming, my mate and i started asking wierd questions for a laugh. "Does it have a 13.5 inch diff?" "Does it have NOS?" "Does it have 360deg cam duration?"..all answered with a prompt yes. Also found out it ran a flat 10s 1/4mile, on half throttle because it couldnt keep the nose down. WTF! all that, and its only a 10s car?!?

The kicker was when i asked "Does it run on pure B.S?"...that was a yes too. I was laughing too hard to go on...
I love feeding it to em, to see how far they go...

haha yeah that was a great night! that night we threw his mate through a living room window hehe cuz i tried to straighten his hat for him and he punched me in the face. damn teenagers with hats on sideways. but this little fat kid with his dads twin turbo supercharged motor!!! pure B.S.

XR8-260 · 26-10-2006, 01:07 AM

Some guy i was arguing with said that I should "know the facts" before I told him that my BA 6cyl had more power than his VR Commodore SS (stock for stock). Apparantly he isn't aware that most 6cyl's have more power than many V8's of yester year.

coonpanelvan · 26-10-2006, 05:20 PM

A girl i went to school with had an imprezza and told every one that it was a WRX, i knew it wasnt so i asked her if it was turbo'd just to make sure she even knew the difference between an imprezza and a wrx, n she told me yer its turboed and every thing. So i looked under the bonnet, no turbo no cooler no nothing, told her she is dreaming and she wouldnt except it. till this day she still belives its turbo'd. poor girl