apprentice teasing stories (light)

[shedcoupe]

Okay, two things - one, dump this if it has been done already, and two, sadistic apprentice initiations are bad. No insert-the-air-hose stories please.
Here's a few -

Apprentice (nervous around girls) is sent to the baker every day to pick up the smoko order. Girls at bakers tease him (because they can). Gets told one day to come back with a 'saucy tart'. Girls get a custard tart and write 'saucy tart' on it with icing.

Apprentice at a boatyard gets sent to ship chandlers to get a 'skyhook'.
Returns with a sealed box. Inside is the end of a boathook with an inflated condom attached.

Apprentice from motor rebuild shop gets sent to machine shop with a broken crankshaft for repair. Tradies glue it with superglue and give it back.

I did this -
Apprentice at refinery is assigned to tradies wiring up control cabinet terminals. Tradies are sitting on 20 litre drums. Gets told to get some gear (including some cushions for the tradies to sit on) from the store. Inside is a fearsome old-devil storeman who terrifies the apprentices.
Storeman gives out the gear, less the cushions. Apprentice asks "where are the cushions ?" Storeman suggests an activity involving sex and travel.
Apprentice has had months of this and decides to not put up with it any longer and says "listen (female reproductive organ). I've had enough of your (excretory product). I want those cushions and I want them NOW".
Storeman looks amazed. Apprentice notices that the tradies hanging around the store can't stop laughing. Realises that the store does not issue cushions. Slinks off.

And as a tradie - when asked by the apprentice what I want for smoko each day I say on a couple of occasions "And a fish milkshake as well". Apprentice comes back one day with a vanilla milkshake that has had a piece of battered fish incorporated. Mmmmmm. Nice. Had to drink it to save face.

As a 14-year-old working with a carpenter during the summer holidays.
Sit down for smoko. Sit in un-noticed puddle on workbench. Tradies say "get out of that".
Tough-boy ignores them - its only water and I'll drip-dry.
Trouble is - the puddle isn't water - it is thinners.
Go home, notice rash, treat with undiluted Listerine. Doesn't improve things.

So, has anyone got any funny stories ?

[Zero_PSI]

I used to work at a pre-cast factory. The **** those guys put you through until you snap, turn around and throw a shovel of concrete in their face is just unbelievable. Funny thing is...as soon as you prove you're not gonna take it, you're one of them.

[irish2]

Originally Posted by Zero_PSI

I used to work at a pre-cast factory. The **** those guys put you through until you snap, turn around and throw a shovel of concrete in their face is just unbelievable. Funny thing is...as soon as you prove you're not gonna take it, you're one of them.

The real trick is not to let it get to you, and to give **** back. Once you can shut them down they will stop. If you get all sooky they will go harder. Oh and any apprentice who responds to my verbal jibes with physical aggression soon learns that the jibes are much easier to take, and to respond in kind.

[BradZ]

The apprentices at trade school are a bunch of f###wits.
If you have ANYTHING apart, they will swap **** around whenever they get the chance, bearing cups, pushrods, etc.

And they only stop when i nearly knocked him out with a camshaft, ahh good times.

[Mr Hardware]

I like harmless pranks
I hate harmful ones
Nice stories OP, things like skyhooks and fish milkshakes are funny.

[FTE72]

"Go up to the storeroom and get a box of 3/8 spots for the spotwelder boy"
Later-after coming back with box of air all taped up nice and labelled "Spots"(gotta love a sporting storeman)
"These are bl**dy 9/16 mate, what are you doing! get it right boy"
And so it goes on until they catch on.
We have had variations of many classics, striped paint, left hand screwdrivers etc.

[ratter]

sent one to the auto elecs years ago for a box of short circuits, came back with some blown fuses in a small box.

Can of grinding sparks for the bech grinder.

Top radiator hose for an early volkswagon beetle (they had air cooled motors)

sent them to ask for a population tool

there were so many, the list is huge, not allowed to do that stuff anymore though.

[|||]

i used to love those tricks as an apprentice. they'd send me on some stupid mission so i'd just meet up with my friends for an hour instead. i'd come back all sheepish with some story about how i had to go all over town for some non-existant part they wanted & they'd all have a laugh. all the time i was thinking "joke's on you boys"

[Brute 33]

Long ago as an apprentice mechanic at a FORD dealership I would usually get greased once a month and other things that can't be mentioned on here.....so after some time a mechanic that had given me alot of crap bought a new big chest of Sidchrome tools that he was so proud of....he left for home one friday arvo and left it covered and locked up for the weekend......
So I decided to drill and tap a couple of grease nipples into the back of the new shiny toolchest and grabbed the high pressure grease gun and proceeded to fill it till it ooozed out ....... .I then wiped off the excess grease and put the cover back over.

Well monday morning came at what a KODAK MOMENT.....the rest of the mechanics were in stiches and well me..... I took off faster than any FORD at the time.....laughing my head off ....it was sweet revenge ....and I never got bothered again..I'm laughing as I'm typing this ....

So for the rest of the week I was a legend in my own lunchbox.

[trippytaka]

Originally Posted by Mr Hardware

I like harmless pranks
I hate harmful ones
Nice stories OP, things like skyhooks and fish milkshakes are funny.

Agreed. Causing life long psychological or physical trauma isn't really warranted, but a bit of a giggle is OK - as long as the bloke/girl can cop a joke and laugh at themselves.

[atec77]

Originally Posted by shedcoupe

Okay, two things - one, dump this if it has been done already, and two, sadistic apprentice initiations are bad. No insert-the-air-hose stories please.
Here's a few -

Apprentice (nervous around girls) is sent to the baker every day to pick up the smoko order. Girls at bakers tease him (because they can). Gets told one day to come back with a 'saucy tart'. Girls get a custard tart and write 'saucy tart' on it with icing.

Apprentice at a boatyard gets sent to ship chandlers to get a 'skyhook'.
Returns with a sealed box. Inside is the end of a boathook with an inflated condom attached.

Apprentice from motor rebuild shop gets sent to machine shop with a broken crankshaft for repair. Tradies glue it with superglue and give it back.

I did this -
Apprentice at refinery is assigned to tradies wiring up control cabinet terminals. Tradies are sitting on 20 litre drums. Gets told to get some gear (including some cushions for the tradies to sit on) from the store. Inside is a fearsome old-devil storeman who terrifies the apprentices.
Storeman gives out the gear, less the cushions. Apprentice asks "where are the cushions ?" Storeman suggests an activity involving sex and travel.
Apprentice has had months of this and decides to not put up with it any longer and says "listen (female reproductive organ). I've had enough of your (excretory product). I want those cushions and I want them NOW".
Storeman looks amazed. Apprentice notices that the tradies hanging around the store can't stop laughing. Realises that the store does not issue cushions. Slinks off.

And as a tradie - when asked by the apprentice what I want for smoko each day I say on a couple of occasions "And a fish milkshake as well". Apprentice comes back one day with a vanilla milkshake that has had a piece of battered fish incorporated. Mmmmmm. Nice. Had to drink it to save face.

As a 14-year-old working with a carpenter during the summer holidays.
Sit down for smoko. Sit in un-noticed puddle on workbench. Tradies say "get out of that".
Tough-boy ignores them - its only water and I'll drip-dry.
Trouble is - the puddle isn't water - it is thinners.
Go home, notice rash, treat with undiluted Listerine. Doesn't improve things.

So, has anyone got any funny stories ?

I never agreed with the teasing , it's boring and foolish however when I started work a few weeks into an internship in Broadcasting one of the site engineers took a lot of joy in trying to tease me , a dozen times he failed until one day the other intern got his own back by charging a .3 F capacitor to quite a high voltage and dropped it into his desk drawer during lunch with the leads either side of his tea cup, when ne returned from the cafe' he reached for his cup and got a huge zap , screamed like a little girl and never did anything again to us after he revoved from the burns , I can't mention some of the other things tried and failed as they were a severe breach of all thats safe and heathy , one of them involved a large hot transmitting valve and some naked copper wire

[GTpilot]

Love the old "go and get me a can of elbow grease" one.

One job I was in one of the bosses son came in to work over the holidays. this dude was great fun!! His mum bought him some new runnners but he refused to stop wearing his old worn out ones. ......So up on finding this out, we offered up some assistence...Sat him in a chair, coated the soles of his shoes with silicone based hot glue and got the fat dude to sit on his knee for a few minutes....We hot glued him to the floor.
Funny thing was he cut a section of lino off the floor the retrieve the shoes. spend all night trimming the excess lino off the edges and came to work the next day with his old runners on! nice new lino soles and all.

[shedcoupe]

Originally Posted by trippytaka

Agreed. Causing life long psychological or physical trauma isn't really warranted, but a bit of a giggle is OK - as long as the bloke/girl can cop a joke and laugh at themselves.

A tradie teasing story - old fella (he handled it okay, so good result) had a tooltray, so evil boys emptied out his tools and had a heap of very thin sheet steel pieces cut to fit inside the tray. Each day they emptied out the tools after the old fella went home and added another sheet, and replaced the tools. Poor old bloke thought "I must be getting old -these tools seem heavier each day".

[snappy]

I once convinced a apprentice that he had to shake the powerlead to get the electricity out . Here he was out in the yard shaking it above his head like a lasoo , "how do i know when all the electricity is out" . "you will just know" took him about five minutes to catch on . seeing us in stiches

[My32Doors]

Originally Posted by shedcoupe

A tradie teasing story - old fella (he handled it okay, so good result) had a tooltray, so evil boys emptied out his tools and had a heap of very thin sheet steel pieces cut to fit inside the tray. Each day they emptied out the tools after the old fella went home and added another sheet, and replaced the tools. Poor old bloke thought "I must be getting old -these tools seem heavier each day".

Love it! Have to try that on our maintenance man.
I sent a young bloke to Blackwoods once to get a McClumpen valve (no such thing) for our block plant. 15 mins later I have Blackwoods sales rep at the plant saying we can't find it in our catalogue. Mega laughs all round!!

[Racecraft]

as sheeties, we had to make our own tool chests.. getting the slides on the drawers spot on or even the hinges perfect was beyond the skills of a few of the greener lads... a few hidden tacks with the TIG had them heaving and puffing on these toolboxes... All the while trying to make it look effortless to get their kit out ......

[Jason[98.EL]]

when i was a 3rd yr apprentice the guys sent me to the paint shop to pick up some rainbow paint

off I wen't 3 hours later i return to the workshop ( paint place only 5 mins away ) with a 20 ltr drum of high end paint cant remember the type but from memory it was about $50 a ltr

the guys were peeing themselves laughing but the joke was on them

the paint shop was owned by a very good family friend and he put 19 ltrs of gloss black and then mixed small amounts of the rainbow colors then gave it a nice swirl towards the centre to made it look like a rainbow

I had the last laugh that day and never had an attempt of a joke like that again as the tradies were to scared to do anything as they had thier pay docked to pay the bill for the paint

Jason

[GT-Pete]

Originally Posted by snappy

I once convinced a apprentice that he had to shake the powerlead to get the electricity out . Here he was out in the yard shaking it above his head like a lasoo , "how do i know when all the electricity is out" . "you will just know" took him about five minutes to catch on . seeing us in stiches

Hahaha ah.... That is gold mate. Laughed for about 5 minutes.

My brother is a sparky so he will appreciate that one

[Thornie]

Not a whole lot we used to do, i worked in a metal fab shop and we'd turn the gas off on thier welders or loosen the wire feeder clamps.One guy one day was destroying a frontend loader wheel hub with the oxy and went to smoko so one of the other guys went and cracked the aceytlene just enough for it to leak out of the nozzle. The bang that went off when he came back had everyone running down there as they thought he blew himself up.
used to weld their tools and stuff to the bench as well that was always funny.

[mark300]

Originally Posted by onetonfun

Love it! Have to try that on our maintenance man.
I sent a young bloke to Blackwoods once to get a McClumpen valve (no such thing) for our block plant. 15 mins later I have Blackwoods sales rep at the plant saying we can't find it in our catalogue. Mega laughs all round!!

i used to work for blackwoods, not surprised by that at all!!!

when i worked for bunnings i worked in paint and tools, once upon a time had an apprentice come in and ask me for a left handed hammer.... took alot to not break out in laughter infront of him

[FGII-XR6]

can't belive no one has mentioned a personal favourie of mine the "long wait" we used this one a lot. I have another story I'll put up tomorrow I'ts long and I'm tired tonight

[trippytaka]

Originally Posted by shedcoupe

A tradie teasing story - old fella (he handled it okay, so good result) had a tooltray, so evil boys emptied out his tools and had a heap of very thin sheet steel pieces cut to fit inside the tray. Each day they emptied out the tools after the old fella went home and added another sheet, and replaced the tools. Poor old bloke thought "I must be getting old -these tools seem heavier each day".

Haha that's gold

[FGII-XR6]

we had this apprentice he was a good kid but not the sharpest tool in the shed, having him onboard was like being 1 man short, we used to call him jungles because he was green and dense you get the idea

well we had this big deck we had to get piped in quickly as they brought the pour forward so here's how we kept him out of the way
go and ask the builders for a box of 1/2" sky hooks.
He returns and said the builder asked if we need plastic or metal ones
We said he should know you can't use plastic sky hook on a public works job
we then sent him to the plumbers shed, another 3/4 hours out of our hair
He returns and said no the builder only has 3/4" skyhooks ( each round trip took 3/4 hour because of where the builders shed was
there was a small hardware shop 8 blocks away we sent him there and the guy play him as we hoped he would he was gone over an hour
he returned and we sent him to BBC hardware (about 12 blocks in the opposite direction of the other hardware shop) he was served by a woman there who felt sorry for him and set him straight
he returned and called us all names that questioned the marital status of our parents but by this time we had the deck just about finished ( I was standing in concrete as I put in the last bit of conduit) so all was well

[uranium_death]

A friend of mine was doing his cabinet-making apprenticeship over 20 years ago.
One of the people asked him to go and fetch a 'pedo-file'...
So he walked off to the boss and asked for one, not knowing what a 'paedophile' is...

[AndrewR_AUII]

While ago I was in a coffee shop and I young tradie came in and gave this big list of coffee orders.

"You the apprentice"
"Yeah..how did you know"

[Franco Cozzo]

You'll find its pretty frowned upon legally these days to be doing **** like making the apprentices run around and fetch coffee, play jokes on them and just make them clean up for the first year of their apprenticeship.

All it takes is someone to be fed up enough and ring up fair work or the apprenticeship board and you're in some deep ****.

I wouldn't try it these days.

[JG66ME]

Go get a:

Can of "Tartan" paint.
A bucket of steam.
A long weight (made to sit and wait, told to go after an hour)
Left handed metric shifting spanner

[04redxr8]

Originally Posted by Big Damo

You'll find its pretty frowned upon legally these days to be doing **** like making the apprentices run around and fetch coffee, play jokes on them and just make them clean up for the first year of their apprenticeship.

All it takes is someone to be fed up enough and ring up fair work or the apprenticeship board and you're in some deep ****.

I wouldn't try it these days.

And that is why these days tradies are no where near as skilled, qualified or intelligent as they once were.

Young blokes all seem to believe that they should start at the top, and not learn the fundamentals along the way. Cleaning up is one of the most important aspects of being a tradie. Any idea how many accidents can be attributed to a messy enviroment?

1st year is about watching and learning. I will never in the rest of my working career ever employ an apprentice again. Pretty much because of the attitude in the post above.

I have heard it all too many times. Kids these days don't know their place and certainly can't grasp the notion of paying your dues.

[AUIIPURSUIT]

Originally Posted by 04redxr8

And that is why these days tradies are no where near as skilled, qualified or intelligent as they once were.

Young blokes all seem to believe that they should start at the top, and not learn the fundamentals along the way. Cleaning up is one of the most important aspects of being a tradie. Any idea how many accidents can be attributed to a messy enviroment?

1st year is about watching and learning. I will never in the rest of my working career ever employ an apprentice again. Pretty much because of the attitude in the post above.

I have heard it all too many times. Kids these days don't know their place and certainly can't grasp the notion of paying your dues.

'

exactly right. as an elec tradie in the commercial sector, the apprentice always gets smoko, always locks the ladders and gangboxs and does a regular clean. Not only does it teach them respect of the heirachy, but why would a boss want to pay A grade rates for getting smoko ?

We always have a bit of a poke with the apprentices, just as i was served during my apprenticeship. But i think everyone knows what its about and you see them take joy the next year in having minor bossing rights over the new apprentice.

Having said that, the tradies play plenty of pranks on each other as well. Hand soap in drink bottles, cable tieing lunch boxes in the ceiling etc etc.

[FPV+fteT3]

Originally Posted by AUIIPURSUIT

'

exactly right. as an elec tradie in the commercial sector, the apprentice always gets smoko, always locks the ladders and gangboxs and does a regular clean. Not only does it teach them respect of the heirachy, but why would a boss want to pay A grade rates for getting smoko ?

We always have a bit of a poke with the apprentices, just as i was served during my apprenticeship. But i think everyone knows what its about and you see them take joy the next year in having minor bossing rights over the new apprentice.

Having said that, the tradies play plenty of pranks on each other as well. Hand soap in drink bottles, cable tieing lunch boxes in the ceiling etc etc.

Totally agree with above I was a 1st year leko once and this was how it was as far as pranks go I was working in a substation at a coal prep plant and down the track was another bloke within eye sight also terminating cables at another sub at smoko he was saying anyone else getting zaps off their cables just like a static hit? took him a while to figure we had the megger working in the other sub.....lol...