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Old 05-01-2006, 09:29 PM   #1
MNM96
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Default Show us your SMS Joke.

A thread by Some bloke with a holden name has promted me to start this thread.
What great one liners have you got on the text,

I'll start.

"Do you remember that time on the train?
I stuck my Asre out the window, and you stuck your head out the window, and people thought we were twins"!


What You got?

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Old 05-01-2006, 09:36 PM   #2
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I have a great one, but I'm not looking for a holiday, so I'm not posting it.
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If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford...
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Old 05-01-2006, 09:50 PM   #3
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whats ya mobile # n ill send it to ya ahahahahaha.
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Old 05-01-2006, 09:51 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Feathers
I have a great one, but I'm not looking for a holiday, so I'm not posting it.
Me too. Mine will get me a permanent holiday, due to it being racist, and related to the Cronulla Riots. Actually, I got a lot of them....
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Old 05-01-2006, 09:51 PM   #5
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too inappropriate to post
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Old 05-01-2006, 10:11 PM   #6
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Now now, Don't be bashfull!
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Old 05-01-2006, 10:15 PM   #7
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I have a few...
Pacific cruise ship sinks with only 3 survivers, Dave, Darren & Daisy. They swimto a small island and live therefor a couple of years doing what comes naturally. ButDaisy feels so bad about having sex with both Dave & Darren, she kills herself.. Sad for Dave & Darren, but they get over it and again nature takes it's course. After a couple more years the lads feel really bad about what they are doing..... So they bury her!

Another...
Nun gets on a train. skinhead in front of her eating prawns, he starts spitting the heads at her. she grabs the prawns & throws them out the window & pulls emergency cord. Skinhead says.. you'll get find $50 for that you stupid ****. Nun replies,when I cry rape and they smell your fingers, you'll get 10 years you ****

One more..
A little girl goes into a barbers shop & stands beside the chair eating a cake, Barber says.. You gunna get hair on your muffin,, little girl says,, Yep, gunna get boobs too!
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Old 05-01-2006, 10:26 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by paxtonandrew
Me too. Mine will get me a permanent holiday, due to it being racist, and related to the Cronulla Riots. Actually, I got a lot of them....
Mine too...
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If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford...
It's being beaten by a girl driving a Ford
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Old 05-01-2006, 10:44 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MNM96
A thread by Some bloke with a holden name has promted me to start this thread.
That would be me....and how does Craig make me linked to Holden....but anyway...

I got one from a mate..

Hey I need you to come down to Knox Police Station, I have been arrested for being the ugliest **** in the world, and I need you to come to prove them wrong....


Also had plenty that would get me a holiday.....
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Old 05-01-2006, 10:50 PM   #10
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I had a few variations on the same theme sent to me years ago...

*insert service provider here* regrets to inform you, your birth was an accident, please report to your nearest vet to be put down.

*insert service provider here* regrets to advise that you were switched at birth, please report to your closest zoo to find your real parents"
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If there's one thing guys in Holdens hate more than being beaten by a Ford...
It's being beaten by a girl driving a Ford
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Old 05-01-2006, 11:17 PM   #11
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Billy walked into the guinness book of records claining that he had the smallest ИИИИ alive, he walked out yellin gwho the f!@# is MNM96?

There you go boys how is that one?

Shaun
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Old 06-01-2006, 12:06 AM   #12
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this rabbit gets out of a cigereet factory after years of animal testing, on his way out, he sees this other rabbit, he says to the other rabbit " my god iv been in this cigerett factory for years, im finaly out" the other one replyd " you must be hungry , come wit me", so there bouncin along all these felds and sees fields of carrots, but says, "na, dont feel like carrots really" so they skip along to the next field thats growing letece, and says " na, not really after that ethir" so the other one says " what do u want then?" and the other one replys "is there a shop around here, im dyin for a smoke"

this was off my old 3315 or whateva it was, i had a few oth them, but i chucked that away as soon as i saw colour and polys lol
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Old 06-01-2006, 08:32 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MYVYSS
That would be me....and how does Craig make me linked to Holden....but anyway...
MYVYSS?
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Old 06-01-2006, 08:35 AM   #14
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If your partner has put on a little too much weight, get them to walk 2 miles in the morning and 2 miles in the evening. By the end of the week the fat ar$$es will be 28 miles away!
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Old 06-01-2006, 09:05 AM   #15
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Remember when you were a little boy and you use to blow bubbles in the bath? Will bubble is out of gaol and want to catch up
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Old 06-01-2006, 10:01 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MNM96
MYVYSS?
Sarcasm.....
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