Mateship

[ZA-289]

Is it a dying thing?

I know people are busy and have their own families and stuff to deal with, but hey so do I and I still make the effort to catch up with my mates as often as possibe. But it just seems harder to organise anything these days.

Is it just me / my mates? Or has anyone expirenced the same thing?

/END RANT

[Iggypoppin']

As life goes on people change and sometimes it can be hard to see your friends as much. This makes the time you do spend Together all the more valuable. I'm young so my mates are my life but soon enough they'll all get girlfriends, want to buy homes, want to travel, etc. Just make sure you have lots of memories mate, and no matter what always be there for them. It means a lot to me to hear that from my mates, even if I don't get to see them as much.

[LowEL2XR8]

I think its because of all the electronic communications now the need to go and see someone is less because you can communicate frequently without seeing them.

[Kryton]

Yep, you can solely blame the mobile phone and the internet.
Before these, you either had to visit in person, write a letter or ring and actually speak.
Those days are long gone and wont be back anytime soon.

[Road Games]

I blame Bookface .....

[Dr Jekkyl]

Originally Posted by ZA-289

Is it a dying thing?

I know people are busy and have their own families and stuff to deal with, but hey so do I and I still make the effort to catch up with my mates as often as possibe. But it just seems harder to organise anything these days.

Is it just me / my mates? Or has anyone expirenced the same thing?

/END RANT

Mateship works both ways. I have had quite a lot more responsibility than any of my mates over the last decade, and moved interstate, yet they seem to think that the onus is on ME to make all the effort.

I could tell them to bugger off but then I would have no friends.......so it is a matter then for me to adjust my expectations of them unfortunately. I do now however receive phone calls more frequently, which is nice, and I think really it's because they are simply maturing.

[Halfmo Rocks]

i've been seeing the mateship die lately...they seem to blame me, as i have kept the bachelor lifestyle (where i met these mates)...but now they all seem to have girlfriends/wives who tell them what to do.
but they have a go at me for not having a missus to hang out with them & theirs. i'm not the one under the thumb
went to the pub with a mate yesterday, few beers over pub lunch. i thought he was joking when he said ''i'd better be off''...not like we used to do

[Riksta]

All my mates seem to be getting partners, moving away, calming down from the cruising lifestyle or partying lifestyle, here's me 30 years old living the old ways wondering why there's less and less people out every few months.

Still, I raise a beer and have a smoke and toast to the old days, and those of us who will live the old ways forever!

haha

[Halfmo Rocks]

that's me too riksta...maybe we need to start hangin out...lol

[pottery beige]

Originally Posted by ZA-289

Is it a dying thing?

I know people are busy and have their own families and stuff to deal with, but hey so do I and I still make the effort to catch up with my mates as often as possibe. But it just seems harder to organise anything these days.

Is it just me / my mates? Or has anyone expirenced the same thing?

/END RANT

sounds like you need a man hug.........

[SSD-85]

Ive never had any mates, so I guess its hard for me to speculate.

[conordec]

mates move on, suggest you do too

thats what clubs/hobbies/sport is for, then you know you have the same interests and meet new people too

oh, and i suggest showering often with soap ;)

[Jason[98.EL]]

Originally Posted by Riksta

All my mates seem to be getting partners, moving away, calming down from the cruising lifestyle or partying lifestyle, here's me 30 years old living the old ways wondering why there's less and less people out every few months.

Still, I raise a beer and have a smoke and toast to the old days, and those of us who will live the old ways forever!

haha

yep we all do that

my group of friends all got married within a few years and I think i would have been one of the last and due to this i have lost contact with most

as my wife has just stated when you get married you tend to hang around with married people.

us on the other hand tend to hang with couples that are getting married in the future due to the less bul crud that they have out of marrage

Jason

[Spudz27]

I have two really close mates, however one is now in Sydney and the other 400km away in Perth and he is also the boss within a mining company so he is busy all the time. I am also the only one with kids so if I want to go to Sydney I can't and if I want to go out with my mate in Perth I have to find a babysitter. Where I live atm I have no mates at all, so I can't comment whether or not it is dying off. Let's just say the last 7yrs has been very boring.

[loosey]

I know exactly what you mean, I'm getting into my mid twenties and a lot of my mates have paired off. It's not the same as the old days when we're out anymore so I don't see them nearly as often, that's not to say it's not good though.
I realise my time of being young, dumb and going out most weekends is going to come to an end and eventually I too will be distanced (even more so if I get accepted into the army). I really should find a girl that's worth my time.

[GS608]

Originally Posted by Riksta

All my mates seem to be getting partners, moving away, calming down from the cruising lifestyle or partying lifestyle, here's me 30 years old living the old ways wondering why there's less and less people out every few months.

Still, I raise a beer and have a smoke and toast to the old days, and those of us who will live the old ways forever!

haha

thats starting to happen to me at 19 man..most my mates are slowly getting a mrs but im still enjoying being single partying every weekend while they do couple **** and pretty much never come out and when they do it's with their mrs..and thats just a recipe for disaster. oh well sucks to be them!

[TheInterceptor]

Ah yes well im 18 and my only spare day is Sunday which is the only day i can do somthing with mates. If they (theres not many of them..) are busy then ill sit on the net all day long waiting for Monday. Strength of some friendships have faltered since im quiet the boring person, so im the last person on anyones mind.

I have a day trip with some subaru guys up the coast next month, the odds of me getting a passenger is very low.

But hey, cant complain.

[buggo]

Wow this thread is pretty sad. I wish I always have atleast a few good mates close by, but since schools finished I've noticed that I'm seeing people less/ not at all. People are going to uni and studying all weekend, or have jobs and are working all the time. Blokes getting girlfrinds and not seeing them until at all pretty much.
I'm finding that the most time I spend with mates is on the phone having a chat and planning on doing something in a week and a half, because there's no time in between.
I'm sure when I get a house and a wife liviing in the suburbs I'll have 'mates' from that life, but to think about not seeing the guys I went through school with hanging out everyday makes me sad, they're the greatest guys I know but am seeing them less and less.

[Beer Baron]

I only have 2 mates left from school that i still talk too, They are very good mates and I'd drop everything if they got into serious ****.

[Road Games]

Originally Posted by 5.0

thats starting to happen to me at 19 man..most my mates are slowly getting a mrs but im still enjoying being single partying every weekend while they do couple **** and pretty much never come out and when they do it's with their mrs..and thats just a recipe for disaster. oh well sucks to be them!

Hoy ! I never bring my missus over ....

[Mont5.0]

Originally Posted by LowEL2XR8

I think its because of all the electronic communications now the need to go and see someone is less because you can communicate frequently without seeing them.

Agreed. No more catch ups required.

[Ben73]

Getting of a girlfriend is one way to kill it for many people.
When I got mine I used to still go out all the time, then when 1 mate got one he suddenly stopped going out with us, now he only does every once in a while.

Another mate, who was in my band, basically disappeared off the face of the earth once he got a girlfriend. After seeing him weekly for over 2 years, he was suddenly just busy all the time, Went from seeing him weekly to 6 monthly. After not seeing him for 6 months I hear from his GF that they are moving to another state.
It's ridiculous how whipped some people get.

Lucky I got single mates too that are not restricted by GF or wives and still want to go out and have fun.

I reckon things like facebook has made it easier to stay in contact with people you would not of normally of stayed in contact with.
About half an hour ago on facebook I found out a guy I was mates with at school was killed in a racing accident yesterday. Without modern technology I probably wouldn't even know yet.

[tankclare]

Im 20 and have it happening already. Most school mates have moved away or busy either working or with the mrs but I still say hello once a blue moon. Although the mates I have now I consider real mates and have a lot of trust. Almost every arvo after work they drop in to say hello or vice versa and we have no problems helping each other out when need be. We rarely go to pubs or clubs but choose to stay home and work on cars are just sit around, have a bbq and down a few drinks. I still keep in contact with old mates from where I use to live and catch up with them when ever I can.

Everyone says I have turned into an old man. I'm not a fan of much music these days unless its a catchy song I can sing along to but I prefer old 70's and 80's rock etc. I even find myself turning down the stereo in the car all the time which usually annoys people lol and I rarely drink (lost interest and over it). As my younger brother says all the time "what happened to you? you use to have subs and loud music and do burnouts etc and go out drinking every weekend but now you're like an old man. Music is always down, rarely speed and dont go out and do anything fun". I think its called growing up.

[TheInterceptor]

Funny all this mention about Facebook.
Facebook hasent really improved or decayed my friendships, perhaps only one improved at most (made it worth signing up, the only person who is like me who is hard to get a hold of) but im keen on getting rid of it since communication on there rarely happens, just a good place to troll

Oh well, hooray for AFF!

[Road_Warrior]

Originally Posted by conordec

mates move on, suggest you do too

thats what clubs/hobbies/sport is for, then you know you have the same interests and meet new people too

oh, and i suggest showering often with soap ;)

Yeah as you get older/move around in life/meet more people your circle of friends will change. Rarely will you stay close mates with the same crew you went to school or uni with. And as your life circumstances chang (wife/kids etc) then you'll find yourself spending more time with like minded people or those who are in the same boat as you. It's how life works.

Originally Posted by Dr Jekkyl

Mateship works both ways. I have had quite a lot more responsibility than any of my mates over the last decade, and moved interstate, yet they seem to think that the onus is on ME to make all the effort.

I could tell them to bugger off but then I would have no friends.......so it is a matter then for me to adjust my expectations of them unfortunately. I do now however receive phone calls more frequently, which is nice, and I think really it's because they are simply maturing.

And this right here. Friendship is a two way deal. My Mrs is learning that the not so easy way now.

[onfire]

My Mrs and I caught up with a mate of mine and his wife last weekend. The same thing applies to us and it does them... they work, come home and repeat.

There was a commercial on TV a few years ago, about Men's Health.. it pointed out the character in the commercial, hadn't talked to his best mate in 6 months.. the time frame wasn't an issue, long story short, he knew at the end of the day, his best mates had his back when times were tough, and thats all he needed. Thats mateship.

[XR6_661]

A lot of it is what kind of relationship you have with ya missus too…

I’ve been in relationships where they flat out say no, you can’t go hang out with your mates…and because you get so tied up with the girl, you just accept it.

I’ve learnt from that, and I layed out rules with my current missus…I just tell her if I’m going out with mates or whatever, sometimes I invite her, sometimes I don’t, she understands. And it’s first in best dressed, if I make plans with the missus during the week for the weekend, then I tell my mates I can’t hang out, and visa versa.

I just wish my mate who is now dating my ex would do the same…But for some reason I get ‘alienated’ for reasons unknown to me…Dodge telling me plans, etc etc…but ah well, that’s on him.

[Zero_PSI]

It's the opposite for me. I don't see my mates much because I'm trying to move forward in life...Buy a house, study etc. etc.

Not saying my mates are holding me back...Just can't really afford to go out partying/cruising much anymore.

[RepSpec]

funny i was having this conversation with a good mate the other day.

im in my mid 20's as my mates are aswell (school friends) and we had our group of friends first christening on the weekend. i said to my mate its started...the weddings, babies and kids birthdays ect. gone are the days of big nights on the weekend and such.

always try make time for you mates, even if the partners are there. we try to catch up once a week for "pub night" even if its a quick 2 beers, its still good to catch up.

[duaned]

You know how the saying is. You have 10 mates throughout your teens, early life, to having only 1 real mate once you are married and have children. I think the saying is very close to the truth.