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Old 24-01-2005, 03:36 PM   #1
RED_EL_XR8
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Default Red-neck Divorce (Not politically correct)
Yeee Hawwww
got this in an email today:

A hillbilly farmer who wanted a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer.
The lawyer said" How can I help you?"
The Farmer replies" I want to get one of those dayvorces"
The lawyer says" Do you have any grounds?"
The farmer said" Yes, I've Got 40 acres"
Lawyer " No, you don't understand, do you have a suit?"
Farmer " Yes, I got a suit, I wear it to church on Sundays"
Lawyer "No, no I mean, do you have a case?"
Farmer " No, I don't have a case...but I got a John Deere"
Lawyer " No,no, no I mean, do you have a grudge?"
Farmer " Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks my John Deere"
Lawyer " Does your wife beat you up or something?"
Farmer " No, we both get up at 4:30am"
Finally the lawyer says " Is your wife a nagger?"
The farmer replies " No, she's a nice little white gal, but our last baby
was a nagger and that's why I want a dayvorce."

e : e : e
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Old 24-01-2005, 03:43 PM   #2
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Politically incorrect, yes
Funny, hell yes
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Old 24-01-2005, 04:22 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fairmont99
Politically incorrect, yes
Funny, hell yes
I'm with this guy
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Old 24-01-2005, 04:24 PM   #4
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LMAO

Which reminds me of a hill-billy marriage that went terribly wrong:-

It was Billy Bob and Mary Jane's big day. All the families were gathered around and the ceremony and reception went like a house on fire. It wasn't until the nuptials were about to be consumated that the trouble began. You see, Mary Jane was very hesitant, I mean veeery hesitant and Billy Bob didn't know what to do. He tried cajoling her and caressing her but to no avail. She was locked up tighter than a fish's *** at 50 fathoms. Finally, she blurted out "I'm soo sorry Billy Bob, I really do love you and I want you to love me and I want everything to be just perfect for us but I'm just sooo scared because I've never done this before".

Well Billy Bob just jumped right outa bed and into his pickup and drove straight home to Ma and Pa's. As he pulled into the drive his Pa comes running out "What in tarnation's the matter boy?" he asks. "You are supposed to be on your honeymoon with your new bride, not at home here with us!" Billy Bob breaks down, tears welling in his eyes and he cries out, "Pa, it's Mary Jane, she's a VIRGIN! and I don't know what to do!"

Well son, you done the right thing to come straight back home as soon as you found out - if she ain't good enough for her own family she sure as heck ain't good enough for ours!"
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Old 24-01-2005, 05:02 PM   #5
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OMFG LMFAO!!!!!! that last one is just wrong
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Old 24-01-2005, 05:13 PM   #6
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Old 24-01-2005, 05:35 PM   #7
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baahahaha ****a's
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Old 24-01-2005, 07:54 PM   #8
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bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

gotta love rednecks lol
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Old 24-01-2005, 08:21 PM   #9
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hahahahahahahahahaha.

Stop picking on bumkins, they cant help it.
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Old 24-01-2005, 09:07 PM   #10
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If you have been married 3 times and stil have the same inlaw's , you are a redneck.
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Old 24-01-2005, 10:07 PM   #11
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: : : : : : BAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA both of em !
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Old 24-01-2005, 11:39 PM   #12
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Both so wrong but so damn funny!!

Gotta love redneck jokes.
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Old 25-01-2005, 12:27 AM   #13
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Bwhahahahahahahhaha

Theres nothin wrong with us country bumpkins :P
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Old 25-01-2005, 03:49 AM   #14
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Yer top stuff
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