Mother's Day for ex partners

nb_351 · 09-05-2013, 09:16 PM

Hi guys I have a topic for you with Mother's Day approaching, if you're separated/divorced with kids do you buy the kids mum a Mother's Day gift?

I haven't buy a few people say they still do cause it's the mother of their children at the end of the day
I say it's someone else's job now that I have moved on

MrEL · 09-05-2013, 09:20 PM

Obviously you have to pay for the kids gift to their mother , but a gift from the partner to the missus. That's someone elses problem.

jaydee · 09-05-2013, 09:26 PM

I say give the kids some quids give them a few ideas and take them to the shops for an outing, bit of father time and shows you in a good light with the kids.

**cs123** · 09-05-2013, 09:31 PM

The kids get their mum a gift. You as their dad finance it. Mother's Day doesn't have to be extravagant it's about the kids spending time with their mum. You should be setting a good example and helping your kids work out how the celebrate the day with their mum. This might be organising a picnic or helping the kids make something "crafty".

Not putting your hand in your pocket for your kids sake is spiteful.

**hawkgirl** · 09-05-2013, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cs123

Not putting your hand in your pocket for your kids sake is spiteful.

uhh, i think thats not what the OP was getting at. More along the lines of does he buy a gift for his ex, as she is the mother of their kids. In which case I would say No, as she is not his mother, just his ex.

nb_351 · 09-05-2013, 09:51 PM

Yep exactly I've given the kids some cash to buy her something with, either her mum or partner can take them. I've had points from either side even people saying dont pay a cent which I think is being a bit immature about it
They're having the next week with her whereby I forfeit my regular weekend with them so they're with her for the whole weekend
Thanks guys

nb_351 · 09-05-2013, 10:05 PM

And for the record I don't expect any different when it comes to Father's Day I expect something from the kids that is all

**hawkgirl** · 09-05-2013, 10:16 PM

well thats fair.

My ex gets on with his ex wife (sorry if thats confusing), he always helped his kids organise birthday & mothers day pressies (until they were earning their own money at least), but despite her many hints (and she had remarried by then), he flatly refused to give her anything on mothers day, saying "she's not my mother."

Franco Cozzo · 09-05-2013, 10:26 PM

Mothers day is round the corner and I haven't got anything for Mum yet...

Shizen.

I know what I'm doing tomorrow.

Thanks for the reminder lol.

Vincenzo · 10-05-2013, 12:51 AM

When my kids were young, as they were living with their Mum I would remind them and help them out to get something for her. As they got older, left home and moved in with me I would ask them do they want my help to get her anything and remind them she is their mother, but ultimately it was their choice. We have been married 27 years separated 18 years and not divorced. We just made better friends than we did husband and wife. Neither of us have another partner.

Cheers Vincenzo

Kevxr8Leexr6 · 10-05-2013, 06:14 AM

Yep ,mothers day ,birthdays,xmas etc. Only my opinion but the children when young want to do all of these occasions. its not their fault so be generous. when they grow up they will remember the kindness through difficult times and be mindfull of your good intensions for their sake. having remarried my 3 stepdaughters are just as gratefull for me helping them with the same for their father. :-)

my_gxl · 10-05-2013, 07:05 AM

Cards that you help the kids make are great. I never got my ex a birthday present and she got short about it, but she is remarried. I ask my daughter what she wants to get mummy. This year pink fairies drawn on paper is becoming the card for mothers day

nb_351 · 10-05-2013, 08:04 AM

Even my partner supports me funding a gift for her from the kids, which is good as I would be the same if she had kids to her ex
Being 7,6 and 4 they're only little they didn't ask for all this to happen so I try to make the best with what I have and the situation

NickyN · 13-05-2013, 12:10 PM

So what'd you end up doing as far as a gift is concerned?
(other than you giving up your weekend so she could be with the kids?)

Franco Cozzo · 13-05-2013, 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Damo

Mothers day is round the corner and I haven't got anything for Mum yet...

Shizen.

I know what I'm doing tomorrow.

Thanks for the reminder lol.

And I still forgot.

devilcv8 · 13-05-2013, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Damo

And I still forgot.

I didn't, but chose not to do anything.
yes, im an arrogant #$#

Bucknaked · 13-05-2013, 01:41 PM

Your doing it for your children. They are what counts.

XAO71 · 13-05-2013, 02:42 PM

Myself and my young man went shopping for his mother(ex wife) mother's day present, perfume kit!!!!! My view, it's not the children fault the relationship failed, it's better to be the grown up if the other doesn't want too.
Ps. Boy's first mother's day without her.(another city).... He made me brunch.

NickyN · 15-05-2013, 05:48 AM

@ XAO71

Well said. And it teaches your son some good life lessons too. And you got to eat the brunch he made for you, so smiles all around!